I'm not sure if this is the best first impression, but an easy innocuous way to start talking would just be to say your transferring in and have a question or some shit.

Why not just follow her IG with an alias and show up to an event she's at? Then pretend you know nothing about her and it's all a coincidence

very Machiavellian here

Lol

What tide said

Being confident and just knowing how to talk to girls like theyre humans is a good first step for a lot of the guys in IE that are transitioning from a NEET lifestyle

Not every social interaction with a girl should have her teetering on edge thinking youre gonna ask her out at the end too

What @missliterallywho said.

Tfw no gf

@Warren H Make sure your account is public so she can see you. Once she sees a photo of you, she's going to decide if you're worth talking to or worth curving then screenshoting to show her friends in the first three seconds

“Curving”?

Two days ago my woman and I ended an extremely turbulent relationship. It was the first time either of us have been in love, or have considered raising a family with a partner, and she has described her attraction to me as being so intense it simply overwhelms her. There are other factors, too, which have complicated things and more or less doomed any kind of future between her and I. The both of us are a bit devastated, to say the least. She's moved out of town, and I've asked her not to speak to me for awhile, although I feel constantly compelled to reach out to her.

@Aleis⊕ccidentalis sorry to hear that, brother. Stay strong, no contact.

Thank you, man. I was honestly wondering if no contact is the right way to go...it feels so wrong, especially considering it's a person I genuinely care about and feel a protective instinct for.

Absolutely no contact.

I think it's necessary for me to get on with things, and not invest emotional energy towards someone who isn't here anymore.

Absolutely.

@Aleis⊕ccidentalis stay strong brother, i can only imagine how hard that is

Always remember we are here for you! Reach out if you need anything, or..just to talk

@SuperTomPerry -RI thanks much man...it's great to know people are in my corner

Are you so sure that the relationship should end? @Aleis⊕ccidentalis I don’t know the reasons y’all are splitting but if you all have that much of a connection sometimes it is better to work things out. But if the reasons are strong enough to compel you to think it is over and can not be worked out then no contact is the only way forward. At that point what good does having contact with her do for you or her?

@SuperTomPerry -RI That's certainly kind of you, Tom. And I extend my empathy and/or advice to you or anyone here who needs it. I feel a protective instinct for my fellow Euro-folk, especially those who strongly identify with their heritage, and I sincerely wish for us all to find a right partner, to be loved and have the opportunity to raise a healthy, stable family.

Basically, I've told her to not speak to me in any way until she's had a good amount of time alone on this trip of hers, and she's had a chance to sort things out for herself and come to a clear decision. Until then I simply cannot invest the emotional energy or entertain thoughts of a future between us. It causes too much stress and anxiety that truly interferes with my life.

That’s a pretty wise approach @Aleis⊕ccidentalis. A lot of guys don’t have the discipline (me when younger included) for that.

@Deleted User I'd like to think so, but it does hurt like hell. I care about her, a lot, and so obviously I'm compelled to stay in touch and know she's doing alright. Ultimately though, I'm just trying to be grateful...I've gotten to spend a ton of time with a woman I'm crazy about, even be intimate with her. I should be thankful for the experience, and content with whatever comes after.

@missliterallywho I've actually told this to her, almost word for word, and she broke down crying, saying that she absolutely hates that I think this about her, though she realizes its her fault. Even if we do end up together in the future, those thoughts will be lingering in the back of my head and it would take some serious trust to not let that potential for error ruin a relationship/marriage.

On the infidelity point, it’s been my experience that young people (is she young) often change what they want dramatically in the blink of an eye. Though @missliterallywho’s point is well taken.

She's 24, I'm 26. She grew up like a typical suburban girl, but in the last year or so she's taken a huge interest in traditionalism, with little influence from me. Since I've known her, I'd say she's a generally rational and mature person, but is slightly insecure and undecisive. I honestly believe this has been harder on her in many ways than myself.

sucks dude. something similar happened to me a few years ago except i was cheating on her. Sometimes i miss her but the best thing to do is let her go and find someone better.

I think only you know exactly what you want from this woman. I would say that some time between now and the next time you all talk would be a great idea. I am of the belief that the right relationship doesn’t come hard. There are trials and tribulations but you never truly second guess being together. If I where you I would go with my gut. My only advice is to look out for yourself as number one in this situation. Don’t allow yourself to be taken advantage of. It is hard for us to tell you what is best for you you’re the only one who knows that.

i wouldnt even talk to her again. the more you stay involved the longer it will hurt. its almost like a bandaid, you just need to rip it off.

Thanks @JesseJames. Like I said, we are very much victims of circumstance here. Had this been a normal relationship we would not have all this extra baggage and neurosis, and instead be able to love each other freely. I agree with you, though, a true relationship with the right partner should be effortless in a way, not that there isn't struggle involved.

@Caboose I know that is the case in most failed relationships, but I can't confidently say going zero contact would be the right decision. Before we ever hooked up, or even put our feelings for each other out there, she was simply a great friend of mine. Someone I was compelled to be around, help out and care for. None of that has changed...so it sincerely does not feel right to break contact completely and abandon this person.

Also, it's not like she dumped me. She did move away, and effectively chose to not be with me, but she's also fully admitted that she is terrified to be apart from me, because she has such a strong affection for me and knows that I'm her mate and have helped her grow stronger in many ways. One of the last things she did before we split was to reaffirm that she loves me, more than anyone before by a strong margin, and won't be able to stop thinking of me.

@Aleis⊕ccidentalis protect yourself and do what you think is right.

Interesting. In my personal oppinion it sounds like she could either be just telling you what she thinks you want to hear, or she could be telling you that to keep you around in case she gets bored with the other guy again and wants another option. But yes protect yourself. this is the beginging of a very toxic relationship that could possibly cause years of depression like it did to me. i wouldnt trust her and look at other options yourself. if she really loves you the sight of you with another woman will drive her crazy.

Whether it's guilt you feel for cheating, or disgust you feel after being cheated on, infidelity will always remain a stain on a relationship. It's possible to work through it and forgive, I guess, but it will always be there in some form. I don't like the mentality of "taking a break" because that translates to "let me explore my options and get back to you if they don't pan out."
I know generalizing women is misogynistic and should be illegal (sarcasm) but the "strong feelings" she has for you will suddenly vanish when she finds another guy she likes. Sort of like exactly what happened when she left her boyfriend to be with you... You should follow your gut here and commit to no contact, including removing her from social media and anything else. Don't wait for her to bring you closure, create the closure yourself. Do what you know is right, and be confident in your decision. I promise you she will be fine.

@JesseJames @Caboose @TV Thank you all for the advice, that is what I need to do, look out for myself. Really, I need to stop thinking about it, and stop trying to put all the pieces together in my head. It's driving me insane.

Henlo borthers. I asked a churchy QT classmate to lunch today and I am going to meet with her and her friends in the cafeteria today. Could be nothing, but good practice in any case. (And who knows maybe I'll hit it off better with one of her friends )

Good luck, my dude

At lunch:
"Wow, so you're, like, thirty!"
"Not only am I *like* thirty, I am in fact past it."
Is autism to blame?

She did say I looked more ~24. She probably thought that when she agreed to the meal lol.

😓

But it was fine. I talked more to her friends than her, because her friends talk more and she is very succint. One of her friends, a 9.1/10 hhweat-field tier trad blonde dominated the discussion with a passionate dissertation on hymns. But she's even younger so not going to try that (plus I have the stench of a pagan-curious former atheist).

Point is, they're out there. Just don't believe the (((meme))) that you need to "explore" and "find yourself" until you're in your late twenties.

@Wood-Ape - OK/MN stench of a pagan haha, that was a great way to describe it

Not literal I hope. Oklahoma is a bit muggy though.

I myself come from that background, back to catholicism now due to my protestant wife. And no not literal at all, just in the context of your conversation with the Hymnist i can only imagine her thoughts, would be much like my wifes were back when i took the northern road

@Wood-Ape - OK/MN Okie, ive heard bad things, twisters for one, too many non huwhites for 2

We're 66%. So not great, but not 45-40% like most of the south.
But only state other than West Virginia to have ZERO Democratc counties last election.

I didn't really comment on any faith matters other than saying (the old "Helicopter Mom" podcast line) that a lot of modern praise music sounded like trying to convince Jesus to be your boyfriend. Which she laughed at.

Nice

I've gotten the "wow! You're so old" comment before. She was 17 and I'm 26 and I wasn't even hitting on her. She clearly was crushing on me though. We were at a beach and she told me she liked my tan lines.

I have a pretty definitive farmers tan.

My current wife was 17 when i was 25, it works, 8 years is a good distance in my book

My parents are 8 years apart as well

My current girlfriend is 19 I'll be 27 next month.

Yea I thinks thats perfect

Just my opinion

Last fall I was dating a 20 year old, 8/pol/ meeting, Evola-reading redhead. I almost thought it was some kind of antifa plot it was too perfect. But ten years was a bit too much gap for her. I hope some younger goy can scoop her up someday.

@Der Seeteufel - SD lol yeah I look pretty Med in the arms, neck and face, but pale Celtic shirtless. In the summer I wear a long sleeve fishing shirt so the Amish tan goes up to eleven.

smh

My grandparents were ten years apart when they got married.

That was when there was a rooted culture and wiser traditions. Now we live in a youth-worshipping morass of ever-spinning pop-culture. Not relating to the same media bullshit seems enough to prove a "gap." Also feminism tells girls they have to be more mature, more advanced and more skilled than men.

It stands to evidence that girls lose value in the sexual market as they grow older and their fertility wanes, whereas men's sexual market value increases as they grow older and accrue more resources.

Like you goys were saying earlier its a natural fit to have something of a gap.

Oh I agree. It's just getting girls in [the current year] to understand the most basic truths is tough.

Yeah my last relationship ended because I dared to mention the "Join or die" political cartoon that led to the gadston flag. Somehow that set her off beyond the point of no recovery.

Dude if she cheated on you, no way

Like a week late on this but just catching up lol

If a woman cheats on you she is toxic. Literally the worst thing a woman could ever do to a man is cheating because until relatively recent history a man could not be sure of paternity. Even now it isn't something that gets tested until there's another reason to doubt. A cheating wife isn't only genetic death but robs you of the resources that you could have used to care for your own children. If a woman I loved ever cheated on me not only would I dump her, I would also do my best to make sure any guy she was ever interested in knew her history.

The worst thing a man can do to a woman is abandon her with his children, but I still think a cheating wife is worse.

The reason I say that isn't even because I'm a patriarchal chauvinist, which I very well might be. The reason is because society has developed to the point where a woman being abandoned by her man isn't a death sentence. She likely will continue to live a relatively comfortable life and her child will most likely survive. She will probably even be venerated by her peers.

There is no coming back from infidelity. There is no way you could have a healthy relationship after someone cheats on you. I don’t know why anyone would want to stay with someone who betrayed you in such a way to make you look like a fool and to abuse your trust in the worst way possible. If they would cheat on you what wouldn’t they do to hurt you?

Press "F" for my okcupid account mk2.

F

zucked again, although I haven't the faintest idea for.

I haven't trolled anyone, my profile is normie Trumpian without even stating it.

Really? your okq account got banned? I didn't know they even did that

second time too.

Wow, I used to reeeee on there all the time and never got banned

I can only suspect I gave the "wrong" answers on "do you want to date someone the same race as you?" "are you Jewish?" "should illegals be deported?"

The login screen gives the game away. Two lesbian I couples, a black couple, one soy boy/white and TWO BM/WF.

wtf

I wonder who okq is (((owned))) by?

I think I have their business model figured out. String along beta whites, push non-monogamy, race mixing and homosexuality on the gals. The achieve dysgenic goals and profit.

I remember in 2015 there was a study across multiple top dating sites that showed the aggregate of data by preferences. African females and Asians males were considered the least desirable. With White males and Asian/white females being considered the most desirable.

Yeah. Blackening is a problem, but less of a problem as we hyper-aware people sometimes blackpill ourselves into thinking. The real danger is the up and comong generation, with the propaganda pushed much harder

I live in a very small town but am far past the age opportunity of picking up "le trad waifu" meme. Sadly internet is about the only avenue. Oh well back to the read and lift.

Nah bro it's never too late

I don't mean in a fatalistic foreveralone . jpg sense. Just saying at 32 with little wealth, there's a small to zero chance of a prime bride.

Which makes sense. at 32 with little wealth, I'm not a prime groom lol

@Wood-Ape - OK/MN Religion bro! Get one. It will not only improve your chances at finding a trad waifu it improves your life over all.

How do you just "get" a religion? I don't know how to have faith without evidence

^^^^^^^^

I wish i had the answer to that. I wish I could have faith. But the faithful are adamant that I am "choosing" my own atheism as much as they are choosing their faith

Actually Christianity has an answer for that question. Romans 10:17 "So then faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the word of God." I would encourage you to go to church even if you don't believe. The ritual of having a specific set time and day every week where you engage socially with a community is good for you regardless.

^^^I agree with this. If I could find a relatively close church that isn't pozzed I'd attend

Look for Confessional Lutheranism. Missouri, Wisconsin, or preferably if you have one nearby CLC Lutheran. I'm CLC Lutheran my pastor knows I'm in IE and thinks it's great.

It's also how I met my girlfriend who is so trad she has literally never worn pants and her favorite song is Edelweiss from "The Sound of Music".

She plays the harp bro! In a sailor dress bro!!!