Message from @ophiuchus
Discord ID: 510268627057115137
They should have the scene where I assaulted by Antifa in the IE movie. But instead of me just getting some slight scratches like what happened in real life, it should be way over dramatized and I could have flashbacks to it when I'm about to win my election campaign. This would be a great movie. @ophiuchus
and like scary music and everything
Scalding hot general tso’s chicken thrown on your flesh, scarring you for life
make it look like I almost died
it would be phenomenal propaganda
@ThisIsChris I dunno, slippery slope, then we have to allow grown men to identify as 6 year old girls
Your chest has an intricate Lo Mein burn pattern because of the fearsome China Moon Number 5 antifa gang
@missliterallywho then those weirdos can’t vote!
@missliterallywho maybe we could set up acceptable ages to identify as. 49 is actually perfect because too old for kids related things but too young for any benefits.
@Deleted User ah, you're right! <:usinnoodle:420778112226164736>
Fun fact: Antifa jumped me while I was trying to help two Hispanics. Not making that up.
da real raysists
@ThisIsChris ages 30-49
Cut from violent antifa attack to show Dinesh mournfully shaking his head while enya plays
Who will play you, @Jacob ?
John Malkovich
Hmmm
You have to name a Slavic actor
I can’t think of a single one.
I’ve only got John Malkovich (who might be Jewish idk) and Mila Jovovich
Also the weird orange alien chick from the fifth element
That's not creepy at all.
Phew, I think she'll make it.
There’s nothing you do to fix broken ribs
You just kinda. Don’t do anything strenuous and they fix themselves
I think a lot of transgender people want their ribs removed and are trying to find a free way to do it.
Offering ribs is technically a blood sacrifice
She’s going to become triple Eve
Are our ribs compatible with theirs?
Semitic Ribs
Worst BBQ restaurant
One study found 20% of 65 year olds who broke ribs died soon after
Perfect! @ophiuchus
Lmao I appreciate you fixing that context
Yeah. Timing was off by a second
That’s because old people are weird. They’re right as rain one week, then they fall in the shower, and then in another 3 days they’re dead.