Trans-ageism is now a thing so I now identify as perpetually 27 forever

Dafuq?

Please don’t make me remember that crazy Canadian guy who thinks he’s a 6 year old girl

Very progressive of you. Physics, Biology, and Time are all just social constructs you bigots! Listen to @missliterallywho

@ophiuchus There's a 69 year old Danish guy who wants to be legally 49

@missliterallywho wouldn't he lose social security then?

It would help him in online dating he says

That’s. Weirdly specific

Also senior citizen discounts

@ThisIsChris he said he'd give up his pension

Ok can I be legally 65 then

So the best of both worlds?

Where’s my social security

He looks pretty young actually

Yeah exactly I identify as retirement aged

GET PUMPED! ⛰ <:deye:359010025223618570>

@missliterallywho if he wants to give up his pension and only wants to go to 49... I guess I'm ok with that

They should have the scene where I assaulted by Antifa in the IE movie. But instead of me just getting some slight scratches like what happened in real life, it should be way over dramatized and I could have flashbacks to it when I'm about to win my election campaign. This would be a great movie. @ophiuchus

and like scary music and everything

Scalding hot general tso’s chicken thrown on your flesh, scarring you for life

make it look like I almost died

it would be phenomenal propaganda

@ThisIsChris I dunno, slippery slope, then we have to allow grown men to identify as 6 year old girls

Your chest has an intricate Lo Mein burn pattern because of the fearsome China Moon Number 5 antifa gang

@missliterallywho then those weirdos can’t vote!

@missliterallywho maybe we could set up acceptable ages to identify as. 49 is actually perfect because too old for kids related things but too young for any benefits.

@Deleted User ah, you're right! <:usinnoodle:420778112226164736>

Fun fact: Antifa jumped me while I was trying to help two Hispanics. Not making that up.

da real raysists

@ThisIsChris ages 30-49

Cut from violent antifa attack to show Dinesh mournfully shaking his head while enya plays

Who will play you, @Jacob ?

John Malkovich

Hmmm

You have to name a Slavic actor

I can’t think of a single one.

I’ve only got John Malkovich (who might be Jewish idk) and Mila Jovovich

Who was the girl from the resident evil movies

Also the weird orange alien chick from the fifth element

https://www.kansascity.com/news/nation-world/article221343550.html

That's not creepy at all.