Message from @celticflame

Discord ID: 441204436975484928


2018-04-30 00:35:12 UTC  

Sounds good

2018-04-30 01:30:25 UTC  

@Pat-MA how long have you two been together?

2018-04-30 01:38:16 UTC  

@Pat-MA Is she redpilled on race, the jq, etc? Is she on board with IE?

2018-04-30 20:40:12 UTC  

@ThisIsChris 3 years and change. @Rick she knows my views and is cool with it but doesnt get into that stuff. But she did make fun of all the Trump protestors after the election calling them babies, hahah

2018-04-30 21:38:47 UTC  

@Pat-MA I see. Pretend you have never dated her and she was being described to you by a friend with the details you are sharing, would you be interested in her?

2018-04-30 21:39:18 UTC  

No, but I am not mentioning all the good things.

2018-04-30 21:40:49 UTC  

And I also do not believe that there is a such thing as a perfect person for anyone. There will be challenges and things to overcome no matter who you are

2018-04-30 22:46:18 UTC  

^this tbh

2018-04-30 23:12:46 UTC  

@Pat-MA I agree. I think "staying together" vs "not staying together" is not really the question now. I'm going to go with the assumption you will stay together and then I would advise that you work with that. The reason her smoking pot bothers you is because you care about her well-being. People usually do that to help deal with their emotions. I suggest looking into mindfulness. There's a great app called Headspace I recommend as an introduction. Maybe you two could do it together. It's very powerful to get control of your mind.

2018-05-01 01:02:01 UTC  

@Anthony Sealy - MO
> When you meet the one that truly makes you want to be a better man, don't let her go. You'll feel it. It won't feel like she's out of your league. You'll just want to be the best you can be for her because she deserves it. That's the one.

I'll forever remember this quote.

I know you said you'll likely not provide other advice, but I like this one so much, I encourage you to share more.

2018-05-01 01:09:29 UTC  

I'm not sure if this is a thing or not but I noticed growing up boys were not really encouraged to trust their gut or intuition the same way girls were. I never really started using intuition until after college but once i did i started making better decisions. moral of the story is trust your gut and you will find the answer

2018-05-01 02:13:06 UTC  

Cool stuff, @ThisIsChris , that is something new

2018-05-01 02:16:42 UTC  

@Pat-MA it's really life changing for someone who struggles to get along in life

2018-05-02 11:35:30 UTC  

Ok gonna finally chime in here. Stick with the mindfulness that is good,also trust your gut intuition, it doesn't lie to you,its there for a reason.

2018-05-02 11:38:39 UTC  

As for the smoking pot,i think for most like myself,its something you hopefully grow out of as i did the older i got saw the people i was around and how they were going nowhere,also didn't want chances of getting caught by cops,i did this in teens,by late 19 I was cleaning out of system & dropped and dropped it all,cleaned self up,didn't want to associate with that crowd.

2018-05-02 11:39:37 UTC  

As to the mindfulness, you have to get it in the right strong frame of mind to do so & make that move to quit for good.

2018-05-02 11:41:25 UTC  

As to the living with someone before marriage, i think that's most realistic, what we did & also what our kids have done to make sure that person is right to live with,to see habits, see if you can handle,etc.

2018-05-02 11:41:45 UTC  

Now i say this as to my life experiences..

2018-05-02 11:46:06 UTC  

I met hubby when i was 20,during Halloween at good friends house. We got engaged by December and started to move in together by then too. In January i turned 21, & there is a 14yr age difference between us,he was 35. Also i saw that he was a good provider or could be again as he was going through divorce with 2 small stepchildren I also took on. But knew he was a good man,good catch & we could grow together. We got married May 28th,which is now almost 24yrs later.

2018-05-02 11:47:30 UTC  

Now I'm not saying was at all easy,in first few years we went through some tough breaks that only made us work stronger together & want to stay together, we both lost our moms those 1st couple years.

2018-05-02 11:48:54 UTC  

Lil later we talked about having a baby as my maternal instincts were kicking in, and at 23 I had our daughter. Which actually beought us closer together and made me a better person.

2018-05-02 11:50:23 UTC  

We have gone through alot as a couple & we had our ups and downs but the fact that we are always willing to work through them & work together, made it key.

2018-05-02 11:52:52 UTC  

I also had my hubby nag me about quitting smoking for those first 2,3yrs and eventually i got in the right frame of mind to quit smoking & I stuck with it,because its something i finally decided on,also being around the stepkids prior,etc helped too

2018-05-02 11:53:49 UTC  

Like i said you have to have a strong mind frame and be at that point to where you rrally want to quit too.

2018-05-02 11:58:23 UTC  

These past 10yrs especially we as a couple have grown even stronger i would say too,and now at point in our lives that things are changing again and we are trying to make honest best for us. With daughter in college, 1 recent deceased dad and now mine who may not be around longer,as that too hasn't been easy since i had him move in with us 3yrs ago,to help take care of him instead of getting a call late at night that he was found somewhere in the boonies,like happened to him when hsi dad died. Honestly i don't think he will be with us much longer either,who knows.

2018-05-02 12:00:01 UTC  

Also we want to moved on out of CA but can't do so realistically for another 5yrs,so have to hang in there. And i want to travel before I'm way too old.

2018-05-02 12:03:32 UTC  

Anyways,final point I'm getting at,is that if you really want something,your willing ro work with & through it together. And if you're with someone who doesn't want ro better themselves at all but constant stay in past,its not easy and will drag you down. Grant it,i return to past alot for references but now I try to make it a habit of moving forward. Without losing those traditional ways of life & values,morals,etc.

2018-05-02 12:04:36 UTC  

I hope my input helps some of you a lil bit.😉🤞

2018-05-02 12:33:50 UTC  

Oh and as far as political, i really didn't start getting into being red pilled,getting into it unil these past few years honestly. At time i was more focused on my marriage,my kids,our life in general. Sure i would look at some things that mattered to me as i had younger kids but i honestly didn't follow it that closely,i was more focused on traditional, normal family stuff. I only got into more so after my daughter left for college & i found myself gojng,what now? That 1st year she was gone was the hardest. But as i also say,I'm at a new 2nd phase in my life & Im re growing again,learning what i really like and don't like,what i won't tolerate or keep quiet about. As i got older,there are somethings ya just don't put up with anymore & you learn to do tjings your own original new way. As i have been finding myself again,rediscovering things again these past few years too.

2018-05-02 12:35:16 UTC  

Please excuse typos,my fingernails hit bad keys sometimes

2018-05-02 12:56:23 UTC  

I just want to chip in.... things don't always get better after marriage, or committing to a long term relationship. Sometimes things are just hidden better. My husband and I went through a tough time, and still are, 17 years later. We have been together for 22 years. I do have a question to think about. Does your gf talk about wanting children. Twenty six is getting up there. Most young ladies know they want children, and the children are what change men and women. .... but not always. I have never done drugs but went through a tough time, including foster care because of someone murdering my Grandmother. I want to suggest not making excuses for your future spouse. Certain things are a concern now, they will most likely be after marriage. Raising children is VERY stressful and rewarding. I know many women who were alcoholics and were addicted to opioid throughout their children's early years, and 1 who lost custody of her son because she was an alcoholic. I hope this helps give some thinking points. Good luck to all looking for their life long loves💛

2018-05-02 12:58:37 UTC  

Good points at what you say,makes alot of sense@PTyler-WA

2018-05-02 13:21:45 UTC  

I also had a somewhat rough childhood do to neglect,so that helped me realize obviously what i didn't want for my child. It can be stressful & beyond rewarding raising kids. If you want kids,ask yourself does she too or does she really, is she serious about it,because if she is,she will stop & get prepared ahead of time because she wants the best for that child,at least most think that way. Mid 20's is always good,or early 30's & is pushing it for some. I know my stepdaughter started thinking about it earlier though & always wanted kids & a family. But she also saw that her mom staying in a relationship for the sake of her half brother wasn't healthy either. As her mom's 3rd marriage wasn't great as she chose partner that was a serious alcoholic, etc. Staying together isn't always easy either so you have to be honest and ask yourselves if its its something you both really want & work towards or not. And hopefully way before any kids come in the picture. But i know sometimes that always doesn't work either so you try to do right and whats best for that child,regardless if you stay together as a couple or separate,you are in that child's life for good.

2018-05-02 14:45:55 UTC  

Interesting stories. To all of the ladies (and men) reading this, you all will get sick of me saying this, if you want better choice in men (women) you must embrace self improvement. As the saying goes, “if there’s a will, there’s a way”

2018-05-02 14:47:18 UTC  

There are a lot of resources and people who talk about self improvement for men but I really have never heard of self improvement for women which is a shame as everyone can improve themselves.

2018-05-02 14:52:21 UTC  

@Zyzz Agreed. Ultimately, the best way for women to become better women is to have better men in their lives.

2018-05-02 20:04:36 UTC  

I will say one thing about smoking grass. It gets in the way with you connecting emotionally with loved ones. It’s an inward habit that takes you away from others. Be present and clear headed in life. Your spouse and children will be better served.

2018-05-02 21:33:10 UTC  

@Zyzz agreed

2018-05-02 22:21:34 UTC  

@Deleted Useragree,well said!

2018-05-03 01:44:56 UTC  

It might not be a bad to listen to a Stefan Molyneux video in which he has a conversation with a young man in a situation similar to yours.

2018-06-22 01:40:50 UTC  

@Tanner - SC It sounds like you're always going on dates