<:wizorblaugh:334498925061079040>

you wouldn't be able to shoot me

I'd stay in a gun free zone

I used to trailbike until I realised I can pretty much walk faster than I could bike and I eat shit less often

damn right

I also have knives and a machete, and a cudgel

have i showed you guys the cudgel I made?

can't use them in the UK

oi! bin that knoife!

we dont want to see your cock, matty

(dm me tho)

whats it say?

Don't worry about that.

deluxxx fuck mk viii

<:pepelaugh:615974280706129941>

I made it when I was 15

thats actually your dildo isnt it

It was someone's

that would explain why the tip is much darker

Until it was his

It isn't my dildo

It's whomever breaks into my house's

did it really take you 8 tries to make a stick

imagine using actual weapons to defend your house

instead of improvised traps

No, mk 8 just sounds better

<:shrugg:418233961203105812>

unfortunately my landlord didn't allow me to build a punji pit under the front door carpet

>renting

Lol

what a shit landlord

yeah

doesnt he know that would only increase the property value

Imagine unironically paying 1.5x market value per month to live somewhere, and having nothing to show for it at the end of your lease

Very brainlet

Meanwhile, my home has already accrued $100000 in equity over the last 6 years

It might even be worth 1/3 of whatever shitshack @Billy Yum Yum Two-By-Two lives in

probably

left or right 🤔