What do dad jokes and paper have in common?

They're both tear-ible

rip

I got it from school

btw love the nickname.
I bet you watch John Doyle, don't you?

*gasps*
How did you guess?

I sacrificed being the first person shown as online for this name

that is honourable.

anyway, back to dad jokes:

I searched dada jokes on google I'm never do that again

That actually made me facepalm 😂

Good job

My job is done

We're halfway there...

The pig looks good in a pink wig.

Guys I think we should give Biden a chance, He will help us a lot in stopping global warming by sniffing out the Co2

Fuck You

it would be better as elsa vader

But then the joke kinda gets lost, unless you can photoshop Darth Vader in the Salvadoran flag's colors with Elsa's hair....

ya true

That’s awesome i didn’t even think of that

?

your "robbin hood" meme....

think you posted yesterday or something? I am late to the party 🙂

Oh, lol!

🙂

I dated a girl who was into boxing. She really connected with me

Or at least that's supposed to be the punchline

A frog walks into a bank and sits down to discuss a loan.

"Hi, my name is Patrica-Mack, what can I do for you?" says the bank employee.

"I wanted to get a loan" replies the frog, "but all I have for collateral is ths small novelty statue"

The employee goes to talk with the bank manager and explains the situation.

The manager replies "Thats a knick-knack, Patty-Mack. Give that frog a loan."

Smh

youlandonthemoonandthereisnowheretogetabeer
thereisnospacebar

Why is 6 afraid of seven? Because 789! I know a classic

Or what happened to the plant in math class? It grew square roots! I’m starting to think I’m already a dad at 14

@😐chillin So? Your mom was a mom at 14. And *your* dad was nowhere to be found!

Why are Americans bad chess players?
|| they lost two towers ||

What part of a vegetable can you not eat?

|| the wheelchair ||

Aww. I’m gonna say this to the person I’m stalking!

But defeated the king and queen. We weren’t about to be their pawns.

Whats the similarity between a lesbian and a turtle

Dunno.

They both choke on plastic

Nope looks to me like the king of bullshit and queen of incarnation won just fine.

Pffft, oh come on. We all know one of them is just a very lucky pawn

Nah Harris has dirt on Joe or something

No luck involved.

Posted this on the FB. The Fact-checkers were shocked.

oop

Dude I heard today a coal mine was hit with an earthquake today. Luckily, nobody was injured.

||It was a miner inconvenience||

I have a fish that can breakdance

But it only last 20 seconds and only once

Why do Elephants paint their nails red ?
||so they can hide in cherry trees||

Why can’t you see Elephants in cherry trees. ||their disguise works. ||
What’s the most dangerous time in the jungle ?
||5pm when the Elephants come down from the cherry trees||

A Skunk a deer and a duck walk into a restaurant, They all sit down and have dinner. when it came time to pay . The Skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put it on the ducks bill...

@Zayga I’m not sure you understand how and what a dad joke is.....

What do you call a bear without ears || b ||

Their just low class memes right?

It’s kinda hard to define but they are usually just really corny jokes

And usually something you’d pull on a child

Isn't that just the definition of a dad joke?

https://twitter.com/i/status/1352331101067481094

If you're here for the yodelling lesson, please form an orderly orderly orderly orderly queue

I've written a series of books about the different levels of sound - there are quite a few volumes

That's... What he was defining..? Or maybe that was supposed to be a joke

A joke is a dad joke when it becomes apparent

A prime example

two peanuts were walking down the road. one got asalted

What happened to the other one?

He got crushed

Someone once told me they are dying to meet me in person after this pandemic is over. I told them I’ll say good words at their funeral while staying at lest 6 feet away from their casket

@[TDE] Smokie I won the no-bell prize as well! But I ended getting arrested for breaking and entering...

Why don't blind people skydive? .........Because it scares the hell out of the seeing eye dogs!

Q: Why didn't 4 ask 5 out for a date?

A: Because he was 2².

🤦‍♂️

Why is the man bald? ||because he doesn’t have hair||

like a belt ;-;

When your dad left you and you're now 'man of the house': <:dogekek:726878872607653918>

What do you get when you cross a joke and a rhetorical question?

Why was six afraid of 7?

||Cause 7 was a registered six offender||

no, it's because 7 8 9

Ok, thats pretty good. Lmao.