Message from @emerytea🌺💮🌸
Discord ID: 535193883026653218
i've read as much as i could from the men's rights subreddit and mentioned to one established divorce attorney (38 yrs experience) how the family court is biased against men. he denies that is the case. is it not in any attorney's best interest to agree that the system is stacked vs men?
Exactly, to change the problem u have to notice it first
hey @IsmELlyOuJoHN , thanks, i just started educating myself and am new here too
Np man I've literally done nowt just admired how the movement has helped people so fad
i'm looking into the possiblility of free legal aid since i qualify as low income, anyone have success goiing this route? or is it very much you get what you pay for? i can't even afford these high retainer fees
i almost felt like giving up today b/c i saw my ex today and thought maybe we can talk this out without getting expensive lawyers involved, like work out dissolution or something
And how did it go
well i was advised not to speak to her so i avoided communicating with her at all
That makes some sense
i mean thats what all the attorneys suggested to me during free consultation, but isnt it in their best interest to avoid having me resolve this with my stbx without their aid?
ok well i must have been misinformed by someone at the municipal courthouse. i was told i can get legal aid due to low income but after calling around i'm being told there's no such service and i'll be lucky to obtain a divorce attorney pro bono
these last two months have been a nightmare.
Mmm
Oof sorry that's a uk link, I even included -uk in the search terms grr
@ChitwnRogue have you tried this site for legal aid info?
https://www.lawhelp.org/find-help/
If it helps at all or not please let me know
Whats the divorce channel for?
People who need help navigating their way through tricky divorces methinks
Ah, gotcha
A common problem for men in the judicial system is high alimony so this is to help this I guess
It's good for anyone in a divorce who just wants to let off steam too.
@InsaneCaterpilla I was recommended that site, just haven't gotten around to it. But thanks all the same.
I'm looking into borrowing money to get at least a decent attorney since I keep reading you get what you pay for and not to do it on your own.
Does $2000 and $250/hr sound reasonable for an established attorney? 38 yrs experience
I've found that $2,500 and $175 is a lowball in my area.
Ya, it is low but maybe I found an honest lawyer (if there is such a thing) and he seems to think my case is straightforward. Plus he actually charges $300 but he said I'd be mostly working with an associate (less experience) for $250.
If it's a trustworthy firm, then good. If the divorce is straightforward (no major assets or dissention about 401ks and the like, no children, both want the same thing) then yeah try to spend as little.
Prep as much as possible though to save yourself even more. Hear court proceedings in your spare time and learn the motions you can file, brush up on the law and history of the law where applicable
For Eavesdropping (where I'm being tried criminally, despite this being a civil affair) I researched simpson v simpson and the court ruling about what is allowed into evidence, what was overturned, why, and what cases used it as a basis for further decisions, and when
will eavesdropping have any effect on your divorce? @Dan da Dad
Hey thanks for all the great advice @Dan da Dad , i been pretty much doing this all on my own. I been researching non-stop, some of the info appears to contradict or confuse me, so ya i think i need to hire an attorney who knows the local intricacies of famiily law.
And also thank you mods for putting this place together and the sub if you did that as well. I felt totally isolated and lost and you know all the emotions that come with separating. So i really appreciate having a community like this.
It has already, as it is considered Domestic Violence, and forced me to stay away from the home and given her control of the contact I've had with my kids (none)
Also, by keeping me at length, she was able to steal money from me and I was nto allowed to retaliate
Damn man, I’m sorry to hear that, my heart goes out to you, it must be terrible or seeing your kids
I’ll be sure to say a prayer for you
I was homeless for a month, my money stolen, and I haven't seen my kids since Xmas Eve, but I've been working every day towards a future with them, and gladly took the suffering because it meant a better situation than I could have hoped for
I went from nowhere and broke to a 3br house (renting) that didn't have a thing in it, not even a stove/fridge/curtains nada
To now a house with stove/fridge/dishes/furniture/dresser/mattress/food and more
I'm also getting a twin bed for each girl - and all the things I mentioned (minus the fridge) was donated/provided. I have heat thanks to the generosity of friends, family, church and strangers