I don't even know if I have true emotions at all
I feel like everything I do, everything I feel, every choice I make is artificial and only a response, or an attemt to adapt to, the environment I'm in, and I don't even know what my "true" nature would be and if there even is one
I haven't had too much childhood trauma or anything, maybe it's just consequences of being a non-high-functioning autist and drinking almost every day for 2 years straight, as I think alcohol can cause brain damage and possibly even schizophrenia

I overthink shit constantly, which leads me to believe I don't have any sort of "natural" thoughts or emotions and my mind is just testing everything I can think of, trying out what could cause the best, or sometimes just the first acceptable, outcome in any given situation

jesus ok this is much worse than me

I miss being home

I miss my life

I miss my family

You aight bud?

Yeet

I know you can feel empty from time to time

It's ok to feel that way

Just not to dwell on that shitstain

The only emptiness is our doomed future

Getting laid off from two jobs sucks

mainly because thye were closing down

Some gay shit.

https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/485925518424670212/561182474554703872/gif1.gif

>tfw your poor social skills will make sure you never get to see this type of shit happen

So dealt with my cousin

A lot makes sense now

And i feel like an asshole

Fuck

This made me genuinely smile

been really sick the last week and I haven't been able to get out of the house

I am living alone right now so its extremely boring

you feeling aight now?

nah, idk what it is but I've been having headaches lasting for more than 3 days and just been really tired

damn

hope you get well soon m8

thanks man

maybe go see a doc?

I'm pretty sure I'm getting better since im getting them less frequently, but thanks for the concern

cheers

take care

you to

Gentlemen in this chat <:Mlady:465443610645626900>

oh shid you right