Message from @NurdKing
Discord ID: 803497047290019861
A friend of mine, who was a road construction worker, was let go from his job following accusations of theft. I didn't believe the charges, but when I went to his house to see how he was, all the signs were there.
These dad jokes are starting to *build* upon each other!
I thought it went:
How do you get an elephant into a Safeway bag?
Take the f out of safe and the f out of way.
....
what
in the world
Is it “what in the world”?
Or “*where on* the world”?
bruh
Lmao
why country humans though?
just
why!?
When you get a bigger bed you have more bed room and less bedroom
My dad told me this one:
Why do Finnish ships have barcodes on the sides?
||So when they dock, they can Scandinavian.||
*it makes more sense if you read this one aloud*
did you hear about the farmer who grew the world's largest pickle?
.....
it was a big dill
Not a joke, but imagine someone scrolling through while they’re high 😂
Two nudists were discussing politics. The first asked the other, "So, have you read Marx?"
"Yes," the other man replied, "it's these damn wicker chairs!"
my husband every time
^me if I get a wife^
Saw a midget repelling down the wall of a prison.
Thought to myself, that's a little con descending.
Did you hear about the psychic dwarf who escaped prison?
He's a small medium at large.
Then there was the nudist colony with a hole in it's fence.
The police are looking into it.
A man crashed into a nudist colony.
Not because he wasn't looking where he was going.
Quite the opposite, actually.
He was trying to get through the hole
There is a joke I once heard that I wish I could remember. It was about a mom giving a dad instructions about the kids..then the dad helping the kids pack as if they were being kicked out of the house by the mom. It was hilarious. Anyone know it?
Mom: “honey, I need you to take the kids.”
Dad : “and we are going to need toothbrushes.”
This is one that I remember
Did you here the one about the cannibal who passed his friend in the jungle?
No, but I heard he didn’t have the heart after all
What do you get if you cross a dinosaur with a pig?
Jurassic Pork!
Credit to @arivera3d , posted in <#801170177902772254>
I tried walking into a Target but I missed
In Syria, there are no walmarts. Only targets.
Here, now, is the unwritten rule for making a perfect dad joke:
Why did the chicken cross the road?
||to get to the other side||