Message from @ChristianChicken1089

Discord ID: 796394182776324126


2021-01-05 17:50:51 UTC  

What do you call a divine fish? Holy Mackerel.

2021-01-05 18:34:03 UTC  

what do you call a dead french general?

2021-01-05 18:34:13 UTC  

Napolean blown-apart

2021-01-05 19:10:01 UTC  

Did you hear about fruit drink pirate?

He sailed the High-C’s

2021-01-06 01:04:46 UTC  

I have an uncanny ability to predict what's inside a wrapped present.||You might say it's a gift ||.

2021-01-06 01:06:23 UTC  

It’s a five minute walk from my house to the pub but it is a thirty five minute walk from the pub to my house. The difference is staggering!

2021-01-06 03:27:18 UTC  

I know a joke about paper!
||Never mind...It’s tearable.||

I also know a joke about vacuum cleaners.
||But it kinda sucks.||

2021-01-06 03:47:10 UTC  

Hey, wanna hear a joke?
Ok, here goes;

Good jokes consist of a question answer format.

Bad jokes start with "Hey, wanna hear a joke?" And then not caring if people want to hear it or not.

2021-01-06 03:47:31 UTC  

A lot of people think that crop circles are caused by aliens spacecraft, but I think they are done by cereal killers.

2021-01-06 03:48:47 UTC  

I’ve been swapping labels around on the wife’s spice jars. She may not know anything about it yet but, mark my words — the thyme is cumin.

2021-01-06 03:49:55 UTC  

Real life moment: I had to call a customer today. I asked, “Is this John Smith.” He responded, “Yeah, it’s Me.” So I said, “Well hello Me, is John available?” And Me did not laugh.

2021-01-06 03:52:20 UTC  

My neighbour spent all day yesterday laying out turf in his front garden. Then last night someone stole it...He's back out there now, looking forlorn.

2021-01-06 03:54:28 UTC  

Mineshaft: ||What a German guy calls his pp||

2021-01-06 05:03:35 UTC  

something will turnip

2021-01-06 05:03:49 UTC  

and then ya throw a turnip at em

2021-01-06 06:56:18 UTC  

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/728498363347107891/796270905730793502/image0.png

2021-01-06 07:40:41 UTC  

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/728498363347107891/796282074481819679/20210106_024025.jpg

2021-01-06 07:49:43 UTC  

<:FeelsTriedMan:726878903146250355>

2021-01-06 08:18:48 UTC  

So, that's a neigh?

2021-01-06 09:01:15 UTC  

un-stable?

2021-01-06 15:06:09 UTC  

He’s so stable, He orders a ranch with his chicken nuggets.

2021-01-06 15:39:53 UTC  

```Cosmetic surgery used to be such a taboo subject.
Now you can talk about Botox and nobody raises an eyebrow.```

2021-01-06 17:44:02 UTC  

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/728498363347107891/796433913182552135/Screenshot_20210106-124321_Facebook.jpg

2021-01-06 19:55:10 UTC  

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/728498363347107891/796466911390072913/20210104_192141.jpg

2021-01-06 19:56:07 UTC  

My friend said onions is the only food that can make you cry, so i threw a coconut at him.

2021-01-06 22:08:23 UTC  

So a German walks into a Bar

2021-01-06 23:03:01 UTC  

Top tip: Disguise baldness by writing speedo on the side of your head so people just think your wearing a swimming cap

2021-01-07 02:27:02 UTC  

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/728498363347107891/796565530550992966/image0.png

2021-01-07 06:50:45 UTC  

came for the memes stay for the dad-jokes

2021-01-07 09:18:26 UTC  

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/728498363347107891/796669064599961630/20210107_041743.jpg

2021-01-07 18:01:36 UTC  

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/728498363347107891/796800720774758420/20210106_210948.jpg

2021-01-08 00:20:38 UTC  

I would date the sun if I could but shes too hot.

2021-01-08 03:41:34 UTC  

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/728498363347107891/796946674434048040/unknown.png

2021-01-08 05:27:48 UTC  

Did joe biden hide is his basement biden his time?

2021-01-08 05:57:16 UTC  

Theres a plethora of plethora jokes here...

2021-01-08 06:56:51 UTC  

what?

2021-01-08 06:56:56 UTC  

I don't get it

2021-01-08 13:38:44 UTC  

<:troll_face:726878856585281557>

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/728498363347107891/797096957138567188/20210108_083733.jpg

2021-01-08 15:58:05 UTC  

Me: I can speak French. "Je ne sais pas!"

My friend: Cool! What does that mean?

Me: I don't know...

2021-01-08 18:28:01 UTC  

Yall need to find better jokes. Using the same one over, and over, and over...
Maybe scroll up and see if its been posted a dozen times before? Lmao.