Message from @blueorange22

Discord ID: 529668110727512074


2018-12-19 23:51:46 UTC  

I still love my wife, despite the adultery, and despite the ghastly treatment.

2018-12-19 23:52:32 UTC  

When I see her, I must compose myself because my love for her creates fantasies and illusions - references to good times in the past my brain doesn't want to let go of - and deal with her as the person she is before me.

2018-12-19 23:52:47 UTC  

Divorce is business. Unfortunately, it's in the feeling business.

2018-12-19 23:54:26 UTC  

There’s also no real social impediment for violent eruptions on men, people just see it as “not counting” because they picture a slap to the face. But worse things happen and men can get hurt

2018-12-19 23:56:12 UTC  

Absolutely. Men feel that reporting is weakness, but bottling the disrespect and treatment can cause long lasting damage to the relationship and of course the man himself

2018-12-19 23:56:28 UTC  

Resentment, trust issues, self-worth

2018-12-20 03:11:10 UTC  

And that men can be arrested for reporting

2018-12-20 03:11:21 UTC  

Or defending themselves

2018-12-24 11:41:53 UTC  

I'm glad i found this channel, just reading back a few sounds like I am going through a very similar experience as everyone here

2018-12-24 11:44:44 UTC  

@Dan da Dad I've been having just about the exact emotions and sentiments as you. Especially when thinking of the good times in the past.

2018-12-24 11:45:53 UTC  

I'm currently trying to choose representation in a possible divorce but not sure how to proceed, can I DM someone for more info?

2018-12-24 11:47:44 UTC  

I can't give a lot of advice on who you should choose as representation... I would think a firm specialising in divorce (preferably one that specialises in representing men) would be a very good bet though if you have one there. COP may well have more advice when he gets back on

2018-12-24 11:48:22 UTC  

That's kind of an obvious thing to recommend though ^^;

2018-12-25 03:11:58 UTC  

You can definitely feel if they are hungry, though. I've had multiple consults and I appreciate a lawyer shooting straight with my expectations, but I haven't found one that has heard my side and responded like they were as energetic and emotional as I am. So I'm going to keep looking.

2018-12-25 03:12:31 UTC  

I'm willing to go into debt if it increases my chances to get what's best for my children, but I need to be committed, and so does the attorney.

2018-12-25 03:13:08 UTC  

One thing, though, word of mouth should be regarded as strongly as web reviews.

2018-12-25 10:45:13 UTC  

@NovemSemita Hello. If you feel bad or need to talk we are all here for you. Hopefully one of the experienced guys will talk you through this. If you need help just page <@&520991890062180372> or <@&516181909554987038>

2019-01-01 14:30:18 UTC  

Hey gang. Wondering how many of you saw this:

2019-01-01 14:31:25 UTC  

Basically, there is video evidence of lawyers being taught to destroy men in court with false accusations. If you watch the raw footage it gets waaaay worse.

2019-01-01 14:31:58 UTC  

jesus, we need to spread this

2019-01-01 14:32:34 UTC  

there was something similar on the sub just a few weeks back

2019-01-01 14:32:53 UTC  

also about lawyers telling ppl to use false accusations of rape to get benefits or smth

2019-01-01 14:32:55 UTC  

i think i should make a twitter

2019-01-01 14:32:59 UTC  

i never have but i should

2019-01-01 14:34:41 UTC  

I'll follow you if you do, though I can tweet things for you if you feel the need.

2019-01-01 14:34:42 UTC  

help spread stuff like this

2019-01-01 14:34:46 UTC  

We must

2019-01-01 14:34:51 UTC  

It's abusive.

2019-01-02 13:35:34 UTC  

Agreed. I have a Twitter account for just positive quotes and a few fantasy football links, and it has grown little by little over the years. It can definitely spread, especially with dedicated contributors.

2019-01-02 21:02:02 UTC  

Hello all, going thru ugly divorce here. Really could use any advice. Just found the subreddit and now this discord.

2019-01-02 21:17:56 UTC  

That really sucks :< sorry to hear that

2019-01-02 21:19:55 UTC  

Which things in particular do you want advice about? Obviously we are no substitute for a legal professional, but we'll try our best

2019-01-03 00:55:40 UTC  

What country, and what has already transpired in the divorce process? Once you're actually going through an ugly divorce your ability to mitigate what is happening is pretty limited though.

2019-01-03 00:58:19 UTC  

Without some of that information the only thing we can really say is: make sure you always have witnesses (or if not, then a recording) of anything that goes on between yourself and interested people (such as your spouse) once the divorce gets ugly. Also, buckle up 'cause your in for a ride, but keep calm and listen to a lawyer.

2019-01-03 03:09:14 UTC  

No country honestly.

2019-01-03 03:09:27 UTC  

No County has a reasonable divorce process.

2019-01-03 03:24:27 UTC  

Maybe not, but what country matters so that you are aware of the specific process and do all you can do to make things more equitable

2019-01-03 03:27:56 UTC  

Yep, agreed. More men should do the research and be aware of such processes to minimize the harm.

2019-01-03 15:02:11 UTC  

People should take permanent legal decisions more seriously!

2019-01-03 18:03:04 UTC  

We are in the states and I am currently unemployed so my funds are limited. I mainly need to figure out which divorce attorney to go with.