Message from @semper
Discord ID: 659501192971288666
<:srsly:642743717085839361>
Welcome to the Cum Zone.
Only cum inside anime girls. Quivering clit. Double jointed pussy. Fresh balls. Elegant ejaculation. First the kiss... then the cum. My dick is in love with pain. Co-op cock torture. Stuff my dick into a furnace. Stitch my cock shut. Pressure cook my greasy balls. Cumblast me, and make it snappy.
Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum. Cum.
What's all the cummotion? My dad fell into a cum shaft. My dad glazed my face with cum. Fertilize a baby with hunk spunk. Cum spunk in my trunk. Cum craving toddler. Cum drippin' cunt. Cummy Rae Jepsen - Cum Me Maybe. Cummy bottom boy. Night of the Living Cum. Nefarious cum mastermind. Cum makes me fearless. Cum crammer. Cock slammer. Cum slammed ya mum. Mail your mums pieces of my dick. Bazinga! Chug the cum, fug ya mum. Fuck my asshole full of cum.
Three little words: GET. FUCKED. NERD.
Cum stuffer, jenkem huffer. Fuck my cum puddle. Bottom Stuffer. Semen huffer. Would love a gator to fuck me. Undercooked baby pig penises. Help my dogs get a huge boner. Waterbong full of cat cum. Accidentally fucked my own ass. I barely had any dicks inside me. Who ate all my cum? A mystery. Cum detective hot on the trail.
Bees make honey - I make cummy.
I can hear the song play but God this is still gold even in text form
I heat up a fork until it's glowing red, then I shove the long end up my urethra and close my foreskin around it. When it finally fuses to the skin, I cut the space between the prongs to finish my dick. I then wait till the dead skin of the foreskin starts rotting and I peel it off with easy, I make sure to take a little bit of the live skin with it. I take a needle and thread and embroid a little smiley face into what's left of my dick. After that, I grab the fork and I rip it out as fast as I am physically able to do. I then scrape the dead and burnt pieces of my urethra off the fork. I fill the inside of my dick with 5 minute epoxy. I then cauterize the end of my dick with a lighter, stitch it shut and super glue it for an air tight seal. After that I grab some pliers and pinch at a specific point on my scrotum until there's a hole in it. I take an enema kit and fill it with vodka, I then insert the end into the hole in my scrotum. I wait till the 0.5 liters of vodka enter my scrotum. After everything is inside and there's not a drop left in the kit, I take a stapler and staple it together, I use a blowtorch to melt the staples for a good seal. I then find the most vile and disgusting scat inflation child porn I own and turn it on on a 70" TV at maximum volume. I start tugging on my dick with the highest force I can manage, until finally I cum to my senses, the force of the ejaculate pushes the brick of epoxy out of my dick, but instead of breaking the stitched end it breaks the bottom of my dick tip, right next to my bungee cord and the force of the cum tears now at least half of my dick split and the brick of blood, dead and burnt tissue and cum vodka shoots out at mach7. The rest of the vodka runs out of my genitals at a slow yet steady stream similar to a puppy peeing. 10/10 will try again.
<:DISGOSTANG:645691813583126558>
<:aaaaAAAAAAAAA:550456611328622606>
;)
<:AAAAA:531152976358801422>
Read this to your children as a bedtime story.
<:triplemonka:550156979419480095>
See bea tee
When your dad starts to dripping cum out of his eyes
He's so blueballed his dick hasn't seen the outside world since nixon administration
Do you suck his dick or get a hooker to do that
Kek
Hooker
wow. 😮 woOoOoOw. 😵 WOW. 😱 SO you guys are SO INTO 🙌🏻 yourselves 💅🏻, like, you are SO committed 💍💏 to CENSORING 🤐🚫 innocent people 👶🏻 that you’re just gonna go and try to get my patreon DELETED 🔥 now. oh, you have an OPINION 📝😡🙄 of me, so you’re just gonna try and RUIN 💣🧨my entire career 👨🏻💻. REALLYmmmmIS THAT what you’re GOING to DO? OH i’m SORRY 😐 , the FBI 👮🏻♂️🕵🏻♂️ never SHOWED UPHHHOH IM Sorry the cOPS 🚓 👮🏻♀️ARE ALL ABOUT ONION BOY 👦🏻 because TURNS OUT didn’t break a single 1️⃣ hhhLAW 👮🏻♂️🤯!!! SO WHAT DO WE DO 🧐🤔??? OwhHhahwhwhH WELL our opinions 👩🏻💻have been invalidated 🚫🛑SO many times ⏰ of him tHAT we’re gufnfnfha disable 🚫 HISP ATREON. Woaowowe.. 😵wow 🤯you would really do that??? YOU WOOULDREALLYDO THAT???? GHHHHHHNNNNHHHHHHH!!!!!😡🤬 Slurp🥤... You TRIIIIED TO DO THE FBI 🕵🏻♂️🚔BUT IT DIDNT HHHWORK!!!! YOU TRIED TO DO THE PO-LICE🚓👮🏻♂️👮🏻♀️,,, DIDNT WOoRK?!! So, instead... you resorts to the PAYCHECK!!!.?.!. 💰💵AND yOU GOT IT!!! 👍🏻HHHYOU GOT IT!!!!💪🏻🙌🏻 ALL MY PATRONS 👭👩🏻💻 HAve been gggrrrDELETED🚫... hnnhhh.. are you HAPPY 😁🙂 HNNNNOW????! aaaaaaAAaaaaaIH!! IFHDHJDHDHDHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! HNNNNFHHFGFH!!!!😡🤬😡🤬😡 Is tHis wHat yOu wAnt HuUuUh???? 🧐Is this whAt Uou waNana TOTAL MELTdOoOown.!.!.!??? 🤯🤬🌋YA LIKE... kombucha??? 🍾I lUuuUuurve KombUcha!!! 🥤🥴wuUuUu!!! WUUuuhHhh!!! WoOoOoowh!!! OOOH!! DriNks🥤 like PEE 💦And smells even WORSE🤢🤮.... OooooH!!! OOOOOH!!!! ooOoOh!! WUUUOHHH!! wuuuuhhhh my patreonsdeleted.... wuUuUuUg my paTreon!!! UUuUu.. UUUUUU....!!! 🤬😡🤯🤬🚫😤WhaT AM I GONNA DO... WHWHWHATAMIGONNADONOWWWW.,, 😠WHAMGONNBLUUU... MruuUuUh,,, 😡MRUUUUUUUH,,, 😤MrruuUUuwHATAMIGUNNADO🤬.....WHATAMIGO NA DO🌋.. I’m cOVERED in KOMBUCHA😵☔️ and i have NO MORE PATREON 💻💸
>be me
>wake up on Christmas morning
>get on Twitter and tweet about living the holiday
>get banned for micro aggression towards people who celebrate other holidays and not being inclusive
>get knock on door
>”Mr. Anon, you’re being sued by twitters KPOP community”
>get served lawsuit for previous microaggresion
>unwrap present from my black, trans, crippled roommate
>Xir (friends pronoun), unwraps my gift to them
>BB gun
>friend calls cops on me for having a deadly weapon in the house
>cops beat me and arrest me and give me lecture on multiculturalism in the car
>arrive in jail cell
>get raped by a man named Jamal
>Jamal gets set free for “teaching a person of privilege a lesson on inclusivity” despite having raped 10 women
>spend night in jail
I love the holidays
URGENT GIRLFRIEND APPLICATION
Now accepting applications to be my girlfriend:
1. Must be Asian (Japanese or Korean preferred).
2. Must weigh less than 120 lbs.
3. Must be under 5'2".
4. Must be willing to delete all other men from your social media.
5. Must cook when requested.
6. Must have a job making at least 100k/yr.
7. Must support my dream of being a professional Runescape player.
8. Must be on birth control or already sterilized.
9. Required to make ahegao face on demand.
10. Must wear good makeup to cover up any imperfections.
11. Required to watch anime with me for at least 4 hrs/day.
12. Must be athiest.
13. No liberals.
14. Breasts must be at least C-cup.
15. I will choose what you wear.
16. Must be willing to be as submissive as anime girls.
17. Ensure the fridge is stocked with Mt. Dew AT ALL TIMES (non-negotiable).
18. Must have house that I can move into immediately.
19. Questioning my authority is not an option.
<:gigamonka:642574896974659594>
At least we're not as bad as the EU is yet, where rape is seen cultural enrichment by the courts
Look up all of the instances of 'refugees' getting little more than a slap on the wrist for rape and assault
and adults trying to enter saying they're teenagers
Finland...
The world truly is doomed
EU needs another Hitler
You, free men, who still carry the thought
Of the individuals true ideal
You, who are not bent by the voice from the bank
And aren't deceived by the viper's speech
When state people and tax bureaus
Want to apply global tyranny
Shall we who can, defend every meter
So they understand that the north still is free
With fire and iron shall the freedom be payed
It costs welfare, luxury and abundance
Are you prepared to wake up from the dormancy
The price of freedom is sacrifice, blood and death
A way of fear, an open storm of terror
That scares the android to a thrall
Is for me, only the last syntax error
Which to whatever price, shall be beaten to death
Fight for your ground, and for your families
Let the flag fly high and lead you
Be hard and strong, and show what separates
A son of the north from a plebeian
Red or blue? What do you think it means?
Nothing but empty phrases emptied of substance
Our head of state bends himself for those he obeys
Whenever they invite for a dance
Fight yourself loose from the blind masses
Time is short, but there's still time to fight
Bite hard and scratch towards the world order's dogs
For they shall never, ever subjugate us
Southern men the thunders mutter!
Northern flags in South winds flutter!
To arms! To arms! To arms, in Dixie!
Send them back your fierce defiance!
Stamp upon the cursed alliance!
To arms! To arms! To arms, in Dixie!
Advance the flag of Dixie! Hurrah! Hurrah!
In Dixie's land we take our stand, and live or die for Dixie!
To arms! To arms! And conquer peace for Dixie!
To arms! To arms! And conquer peace for Dixie
Fear no danger! Shun no labor!
Lift up rifle, pike, and saber!
To arms! To arms! To arms, in Dixie!
Shoulder pressing close to shoulder,
Let the odds make each heart bolder!
To arms! To arms! To arms, in Dixie!
Advance the flag of Dixie! Hurrah! Hurrah!
In Dixie's land we take our stand, and live or die for Dixie!
To arms! To arms! And conquer peace for Dixie!
To arms! To arms! And conquer peace for Dixie!
Swear upon your country's altar
Never to submit or falter--
To arms! To arms! To arms, in Dixie!
Till the spoilers are defeated,
Till the Lord's work is completed!
To arms! To arms! To arms, in Dixie!
No
<:dixie_pill:609945503488278529>
pretty good song tbh
No
>the year is 2042
>the sky is now purple after the chinese gay bombs went off in israel
>there is a global extinction because 99% of the animals are homosexual with the exceptions being ants, jellyfish, and plants
>Currency has been completely replaced with condoms, DMT, and steam gift card vouchers
>cali sunk into ocean
>hawaii got lifted out of the ocean and is now a continent the size of europe
>ayyy's disclosed themself after realising the governments of earth are too incompetent to disclose for them
>there is a global shortage of sand
>frankist jews still own the world but dont even hide themselves anymore
>the CIA couped america into a fascist dictatorship with mandatory MKULTRA experimentation on all civilians and breeding with your own race is a federal crime
>mexico legalised all drugs and is now the economic king of earth
>There is a global conspiracy related to pumkin seeds, orchestrated by people above even the jews
>Racism is now a crime, instant execution
>Sexism is now a crime, instant forced gender reassignment surgery
>All sea life except jellyfish is dead
>Hitler finally came out of the antartic with flying saucers and annexed australia, is now fighting a holy war with the rest of earth and the ayys
>Electricity does not exist outside of nuclear countries
>Isis finally made a caliphate and is allied with aussie hitler
>Some nerd from amsterdam found a way to convert oxygen into weed, you can now no longer breath without getting high world wide
>canada is a crater
>bulgaria now owns the entirety of the bulkans
>the UK is still asking for brexit extensions
>siberia declared independance and is fighting a war with russia
>ukraine now has the most powerful military in europe
>germany is a a territory of the isis caliphate
Nice fanfic nerd
Issa copypasta nigga