then go bigger like geting promotion

then bigger

and so on so one

and push forward without looking at people

trust me i stoped carring about ppl

i hate most of them just for being themself

almost everyone of them is acting like fucking npc in skyrim

man im acting like npc irl like go to school go home study sleep repeat

that give you immunity to the world around ya

acting like one doesn't mean you are one

i do that to thats how we need to live to not to be outcast from society

and to be hostest i stoped carring about that

im outcast like dont have real friends

i started to like being alone

yep we are in the same stage like sitting alone with headphones is better option tha talking with ppl in my class

(i mean of isolation not problems of live)

have you got dreams about doing mass shooting or other fucked up shit?

nope

i don't really remember what happends in my dreams

if i remember they are nightmares

like some strong dreams are mostly connected with sufering or makeing others suffer

and ends up the same

i wake up

and start doing my shit

and then another one

day

end it ends up the same with dream

fucked up dream

and key (in my opinion) to feeling grate is achiving goals and living those dreams trying to memorise them

and man if you will be sometime in future in 3-city that would be nice to go for a round or two (but first i need to nail my sat)

i will hit you up if i ever get there but i think i my go there this summer

Gonna quit my job soon. Hopefully find something else right away. May go work for the post office or federal express. Might be a porter over at a ford dealership

Fingers crossed for you my dude

Thanks. I cant take anymore of the bullshit there...

Yeah I don't blame you one bit.

Chnaging the board up is tough - it can be a struggle.

But fuck man - it's a lot cleaner and nicer when you do.

Im doing well lately, nothing that gave me a reason to get pissed off, or make me sad in some way

But im afraid things get bad again

Or worse

Just focus on staying steady - remaining calm - maintaining control of your situation - etc