When you are dyslexic and you ask Satan for a puppy rather than Santa.

@ChristianChicken1089 I resemble that dad joke.....

i heard this from my friends dad and it is by far the worst i have ever heard

what is the difference between abu dhabi and dubai?

dubai doesnt watch the fllintstones

but abu dhabi do!

please forgive me

jeenyus

The little pebble’s most fervent wish was to be boulder.

@ChristianChicken1089 I don't get it lol

A-spar-a-gus --> A spare I guess

-gus*

that's kinda eh

even for a dad joke

"that's kind" ~~a eh~~

Your welcome. 🙂

<:dogekek:726878872607653918>

So my uncle see he's into smoking and while at a gas station he lit up just as he was filling his tank.
At some point he drops the pump thing and gets gasoline on his sleeve, so like a normal person he used his right hand to try and brush it off of him. But he was holding his cigarette in that very hand too.
Seconds later the cops arrive and my uncle was arrested for waving a firearm in public.

Why didn't the green pepper practice archery? Because he didn't habanero.

Where do chicken tenders hang out at?

||The strip club||

<:KEK:726877368601411624>

not really a dad joke, but still is a dad joke ❤️

An American couple was being shown around Moscow one day, when the man felt a drop hit his nose.

“I think it’s raining,” he said to his wife.
“No, that felt more like snow to me,” she replied.
“No, I’m sure it was just rain,” he said.

Well, as these things go, they were about to have a major argument about whether it was raining or snowing.

“Let’s not fight about it!” the man said. “Let’s ask our guide, Rudolph, whether it’s officially raining or snowing.”

As their tour guide approached, the man said, “Tell us, Comrade Rudolph, is it officially raining or snowing?”

“It’s raining, of course,” he replied officiously.

But the woman insisted, “I know that it felt like snow!”

The man quietly replied, “Rudolph, the Red, knows rain, dear!“

Bravo