Message from @MountainMan

Discord ID: 574619013024317466


2019-05-05 15:24:27 UTC  

No.

2019-05-05 15:24:31 UTC  

hell, I'll stick my hand in a lime slime

2019-05-05 15:24:33 UTC  

I could just invite you to the roll20 server to see it

2019-05-05 15:24:43 UTC  

@Peacekeeper_Cypress what did they do

2019-05-05 15:24:45 UTC  

I need to hear it

2019-05-05 15:24:48 UTC  

"Why is Ronnie standing all jacked up like that?"

2019-05-05 15:24:53 UTC  

I need to tell ya'll my PC retard moments

2019-05-05 15:24:54 UTC  

they probably touched it

2019-05-05 15:24:55 UTC  

"OH GOD ITS A-"

2019-05-05 15:25:05 UTC  

ok ok wall of text imbound

2019-05-05 15:25:09 UTC  

nice

2019-05-05 15:25:11 UTC  

nice

2019-05-05 15:25:25 UTC  

dnd stories are some of the most funny ones imo hahahaha

2019-05-05 15:26:13 UTC  

@Deleted User down for another game this summer?

2019-05-05 15:27:50 UTC  

ahhh okay

2019-05-05 15:27:55 UTC  

@Peacekeeper_Cypress I NEED THAT WALL OF TEXT

2019-05-05 15:28:00 UTC  

ang on

2019-05-05 15:28:06 UTC  

typing on word lol

2019-05-05 15:28:25 UTC  

hahahahahaah

2019-05-05 15:30:42 UTC  

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/473695205418205194/574618984997978132/fantasy_map_1555417087483.pdf

2019-05-05 15:30:48 UTC  

@Angus made it into a pdf lol

2019-05-05 15:42:23 UTC  
2019-05-05 15:42:36 UTC  

HERE IT COMES

2019-05-05 15:42:52 UTC  

So its Halloween. I broke out all the props and tooth picks. Most of which didn’t get used (200% mad) because they died. Clearing out this church that got taken over Diablo 1 style. So they clear the first two rooms full of all kindsa fucked up shit. Came upon a storage room with those sort of garage like doors that fold up into the wall.
Player opens one. Its empty. No alter with a still beating heart, no sign that says dead nibber storage. Nothin. Spot check to see the shimmer. He sees it, its just a room with a jello cube in it. He goes “huh” and slams the door shut.

2019-05-05 15:43:16 UTC  

Problem solved. I considered that a totally viable solution. Ideally they would be in and out of the cathedral before that cube could chew through the metal. I was prepared to reward them with gold it was sitting on (I reward problem solving any way I can.) So the party opens all the doors. Player doesn’t TELL ANYONE ANYTHING. No one knows theres a cube there. Decided that the previous two rooms were too much and they needed to sleep to regain spells.

2019-05-05 15:43:40 UTC  

Now. Keep in mind this isnt a cave system. Its not an abandoned building. Its an active enemy fortification. And theyre just sitting in one the storage rooms asleep. I was in the back ground shifting numbers and adding more loot to the next rooms so they could get through. They know I do this all the time as many of them have DM’d before. They know that so long as they don’t do anything stupid, they can’t die for plot reasons, as the gods have chosen them as their champions. Theyre effectively immortal on the proviso that their gods don’t decide theyre retarded and pick new mortals. It was like a life system almost.

2019-05-05 15:43:53 UTC  

So that cube that was originally a non-issue on account of “it would take that thing like at least 5 hours to eat through that door”….now has said 5 hours to eat through the door. They left a little lizardman awake on watch duty. Ronnie. Funny guy. The cube ate through the door and Ronnie failed his listen check. Then his spot check. Then his con save. Ronnie was paralyzed and inside the cube. There was no one else awake to help Ronnie. Ronnie had died to CR-3 monster at level 6.

2019-05-05 15:44:19 UTC  

My mate cookie wakes up. “Why is Ronnie standing one leg?” Ronnie was after all, making a weird face and standing on leg, his arms contorted above him. Upon closer inspection, he knew two things. One, Ronnie was a deadman. Two-

2019-05-05 15:44:25 UTC  

'OH GOD ITS THE-"

2019-05-05 15:44:38 UTC  

No one was around to help pull him from the jello. The other two woke up 4 hours later. After the third person in a row failed their con save, the paladin was alone to kill this cube. Cube won with 3 HP. Total party wipe.

I was dumbstruck.

2019-05-05 15:45:00 UTC  

Not even effective immortality Geras from MK-11 style could keep the party alive.

2019-05-05 15:46:13 UTC  

<:high_iq:382980759012638731>

2019-05-05 15:46:20 UTC  

AHAHAHHAHAHAAHHHAA

2019-05-05 15:47:05 UTC  

"The gods have decided youre all retards. Especially you."

2019-05-05 15:47:09 UTC  

"Who?"

2019-05-05 15:47:13 UTC  

"Yes."

2019-05-05 16:07:00 UTC  

You still looking for another player? I'm up for it

2019-05-06 06:32:51 UTC  

@Goblin_Slayer_Floki what are your gripes with 5e

2019-05-06 08:24:19 UTC  

Where to even start...

2019-05-06 08:31:10 UTC  

🍿