Paul WA

@PF-640514 RocketChat ID: YnfDRQeafwtCSBiFN

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Hi guys. Glad to be here.

Should I post the photos I took (along with mentioning who else was there) after reading the organizational documents & guidelines?

Is there a specific format to follow? Do I tag their names or just mention them? It was Clarke and Ethan, correct?

Understood, thanks, I'll get to it

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Forgot the label, right right I'll fix that

My bad.

Is there a way to upload multiple photos per post?

On a browser right now

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Huh, well I'll figure it out, I'll just post them individually in the activism channel all tagged with Bremerton like you said

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First promat run with @ND - John WA @Clarke WA and @Ethan WA

That look good?

Understood, I'll make sure to permalink my posts in the activism channel here from now on

Preferably, the later in the day, the better. I can meet up Sat/Sun/Mon. Not sure where we should meet up at, I imagine you would have a better idea of good spots?

I'm the same, around Poulsbo. I don't know how active things are in Kitsap but I'm up for doing solo activism in case it's inconvenient to meet up due to the distance some times. Look forward to contributing however I can.

I've got a late schedule as well. Too late is anything past 1AM. Earlier than that and I should be good.

Pretty well, just adjusting. I apologize if the drive for my interview was inconvenient. Do you know how critical it is to get all the clothing right away? And does anyone put promat up wearing everything, or is it only for demonstrations?

Okay thanks, yeah I'll get the basic stuff. How did I look during the interview? Anything I should change about my appearance? I'm open to suggestion

And on the posters, depends where, I won't be able to drive too far but if it's close I'm up for it

Okay but where IS the place I have to drive to? I'm meeting up with Clarke to get a starter kit sometime over the weekend as well

Federal Way is a no go for me tonight. Seattle is actually more convenient for me since I can take a ferry over. What time were you guys thinking? I'd be better able to manage if I knew about this last night but I understand I was hardly in then

I'm looking at a map right now. If you guys have no qualms with picking me up I might manage, it's just going to be a bit of a time crunch for me. Give me a minute.

So I'm on the different ferry system, near Pioneer Square. That's where I'd be at. I don't know if that complicates the pick up too much. What time is this?

Close to Bainbridge. If I took my car it's going to be a headache for me to get through Seattle. I'm not used to it. Don't know what to say. I need more practice.

I can't do it tonight. I'm sorry.

I can't commit to it. Just count me out for the posters tonight. I'm going to meet up with Clarke soon. This just came up too quick for me. I apologize.

Sounds good. Is this tomorrow or Monday? Monday would work better for me but I don't have much of a preference.

I understand it's going to be a while until the next opportunity but I can't do it tonight. I have no way of going about it. I'll make up for this, but it's on me.

I'm going to be super on edge and this is pushing it for me due to the short notice. If you guys are willing to make the accommodation for pick up, then yes. I'm going to talk to Vincent and see how doable it is for him.

Alright. I need to be picked up at the ferry terminal near Pioneer Square in Seattle. That's the easiest way for you guys, instead of driving around the water. Otherwise I can't make it tonight. When were you guys originally planning on doing the postering? I need to figure out the ferry now.

What time were the posters originally going to be put up? I need to figure out the ferry now

I would have to be back at the Seattle (Bainbridge/Bremerton) ferry terminal by 10PM tonight. If you guys can pick me up and drop me off back there, I can make it work.

7:20PM, depending on if the boat is a few minutes late.

Alright, I'll be there then.

Just lmk what to look out for once there.


Sounds good.

I'll drive to Shelton tomorrow. 9:30PM would be good I think. Where is the specific area we'll be meeting up at?


It's departing at 6:40PM, will get to Seattle soon enough to get me ready by 7:20 for the pickup.

Clarke. I think I'm going to leave the organization. This isn't for me. I don't have the nerve for it. I'm saying this now not to waste anymore time for dedicated members. I think it's great what PF is doing but it isn't for me. I hope you guys succeed and wish you good luck. Not sure who has to be contacted to kick me out but I'm out.

@Vincent WA @Ethan WA I'm leaving the organization. Don't have the nerve for it. I wish you guys the best of luck and think if anyone succeeds it's going to be PF, but I'm not cut out for this. Pussy move but I'm doing this for your guys' consideration. I'm out. Contact whoever needs to be contacted to kick me out.

I don't want to back out after you guys invested your time and energy into putting me through the interview process. I also understand the stakes here. I simply feel incapable of being on the level of the other members. Maybe it does take time. I don't think I've given off a good impression to have cold feet this early in, but it's hard to help. I read the guides on opsec and putting up promat like the stickers. Where is the line drawn between putting promat up and something you could get charged for? I felt it was right immediately after the interview, and I don't regret that, but it's tough to think about doing any more. Two main issues are I don't feel comfortable driving this place and that, and I don't know about the time investment each week. I'm very inexperienced, basically, and don't want to waste anyone's time. If I can't commit, what's the point of investing any more in me? I like what PF is doing. A lot. But to actually be out there gives me way more anxiety than watching videos. It's not easy and I feel in over my head. I know I should have went into the interview process with my mind already made up on these things, and I guess they were at the time, yet now I feel stupid.

I did give everything some thought. I don't know how feasible this is but I think I could work up my confidence best by doing some solo runs, just the flyers / stickers a bit outside my immediate area before doing anything bigger. Of course, I don't have any promat to put up at the moment. I still have to meet up with Clarke to get that. I guess while meeting up with him he could give me some tips on setting up promat in case anything else was missed that time after the interview. I just feel freaking sketched out. It gets at me, that this is entirely because PF has no other choice than to operate the way it does, stuff has to be vague, there are a lot of unknowns. I hate that, but it's all the more reason for the organization to keep fighting, because it's messed up that it has to be that way in the first place. Eventually, if PF is successful, I know people will be able to be open about reality and what makes this nation what it is ... without having their life ruined. I just feel animal anxiety about this stuff, like I'm about to be kidnapped!.. Don't want to sound like a schizo but that's how it really is.

I'm going to check in with Clarke. See if he can still meet up tomorrow. If not, I'm good waiting another week. I know PF is an activist organization at its core and I'm basically dragging myself along at the beginning, but I've never done anything remotely like this. Was not prepared whatsoever.

I'm going to check back tomorrow. I don't know how the process would be handled or if I can return at a later date when I'm better off and able to do activism. I wish I were more capable. At the present time, I just need to get out. I can't do it. I genuinely apologize. I don't know how much that means when I have only words and no actions to show for it. Regardless, my decision to stop at the present time won't be changing.

In the meantime, I will try to do more for the movement, I'm not quitting the effort to fix the country. This whole thing tells me I just have to convince myself better of the why risks are worth taking. I get it mentally, but emotionally and physically I'm not there.

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