Meat slicer, my dude
But in all seriousness, that fucking sucks and is a slap in the face

I'm sorry about that

What a bitch

i'd say it gets better but that would be a lie

you just acclimate to it

is it wrong of me to miss an ex like that while i have a gf? i dont want to be back with her or anything but im just stuck on her and its been well over a year. i dont love her anymore but i think about her alot and i feel guilty like im cheating on my gf with my thoughts

that's why it's a fucked up thing to do to people

Have you talked to your gf about it?

shit is trauma

i couldnt talk to my gf about it it would crush her she loves me so much she would feel like she wasnt doing enough

which isnt true at all

the realization that even those closest to you are capable of utter dishonesty

Uh

I think you should talk to her about it?

Yeah

It's clearly a problem

i mean it isnt hurting our relationship and i do love my gf its just something i think about a lot

Talk to her about it

the more you think about it the more you're going to think about it in the future

it isnt love or hate im feeling just loneliness because she was such a good friend for so long

best to interrupt the cycle when it's happening

think of it like exercising your free will

the thing is my current gf and her were like arch enemies when they were younger

and she still hates her

OK, but if you explain that to her that you value her as much as you do and don't want to upset/hurt her and that you're upset about it, she's going to understand it?

Like

i've thought that about things before and have been very wrong^

If she can't handle this type of conversation about how much you value her, and she gets angry/upset enough about it to compromise your relationship, it's not going to work out

that much is true

idk shes just kinda fragile and i dont want to upset her and i feel like itll go away on its own because i havent been thinking aout her as much recently and it was just this engagement that reopened old wounds

fragility fades from facing hard shit

idk man emotions are high atm

to protect someone from everything deprives them

Yeah, you don't get stronger from shit if you're not exposed to it

well the thing is shes faced enough hard shit in her life. her family situation was fucked up and her grandmother who she had to live with is a royal bitch that shit talked her her whole childhood and made her self esteem drop to negatives so ive been having to prop her up and make her feel good about herself since we got together and i dont want to erase that progress by making it seem like she isnt what i want

I understand your want to.. "protect"? your gf from nasty stuff especially if she's fragile

But at the same time, if you want to boost her confidence and self esteem, you need to be able to trust her with rough shit

i know but i dont want to make her feel bad because i hate when she cries

At least that's how it goes from my personal experience with my own bullshit

she would do anything for me and i dont want her to have to deal with something i should be able to fix on my own

i hate that its even a problem but that shit really fucked me up for a long time