You know how I am, and she deals with that, so there's more than a kernel of truth to it

@jecc13

Boundaries are greatly important. Sometimes she just does not respect the "no" for an answer. It was really unimportant but this morning I was leaving for work and she asked me to get her ice water. She also has a habit of asking me for my water because she doesnt snag any when we go downstairs to eat but i digress. I told her no for the ice water because i already had a few things this morning to do and dont like that to be interrupted. I know it's really a minute thing but the reality is just like you said. Boundaries need to be respected and without it, it causes resentment.

I do plan on talking to her about a few different things that need to happen but I'm not exactly the best face to face explaining emotionally related things

@Scr0m nah chief, I get it. @jecc13 asks me for ice water all the time and it gets more than a bit annoying at times. But you do need those boundaries and spaces where you can be you

I personally need time to exist by myself since my girl is always in my space and around. It's why I tend to go to work like an hr prior to shift starting so I can be alone

I feel that

@Scr0m set boundaries
@Deadbeat Radio idk man...got any advice for the guy?

@Scr0m#0699 @thedarkness05 and I had to have that conversation and it wasnt pleasant for me to hear but it was for the best. [For both water and space]

I think that communication on what you need day to day is important, some days @thedarkness05 wants to hangout and do whatever but then theres days where he has to hang with his goons or play dnd or do his thing and then I do my thing.

First time I see my grandparents that sad. Hard to cope with the ideia you have to burry your own son

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z6UxF14vPM0

for anyone who needs a little inspiration today

Not really a problem but uhhh

Can someone send me the original picture?
My google is being mega gay

Okay boys

Fuckin question for you

Tryna figure out how to deal with this one

So I'm way into the fitness thing

I'm 5'10" 179, 17%bf, play hockey, eat well, run my own business, shits dope, I regularly defuse attempts from girls hitting on me and shit cuz I'm married

Wife is overweight, depressed, not into hobbies, and it's frustrating

I am becoming less attracted to her over time

She cannot maintain any kind of self discipline in regulating her diet or working out regularly. Meanwhile I'm over here in the gym 3x a week and on the ice 2x a week playing hockey

You’re gonna need a lotta lye and trash bags

Lol

Anyway shits weird and I feel retarded for fantasizing about cheating on her with someone more attractive to me. I would not ever actually do it, because I deeply value my commitment in marriage but I also hate that it's been relegated to a duty thing

@Bodark Actual

Hey man, I'm in the exact same boat

I just beat off more and find meaning in other things. Over time I've found I could either take or leave the whole marriage thing. It doesnt mean i dont love my wife, but for several years up till recently shes had no real drive to fix her depression and telling her she needs to loose weight is like telling a jew the holocaust didnt happen. I think theres an issue where modern women, whove been fed feminist bullshit their entire lives (go school, go career, children scary), who do end up married are confused about the natural dynamic they usually take if both parts are faithful. Maybe she doesnt feel like shes lived up to some expectations our lord knows what, depression is weird, but of just try giving positive reinforcement around the house and acknowledge shit she does here and there. Its helped some with mine.

I feel you man, I know the issue. I'd say try and have her find a friend group or something. Like we have our fraternities and clubs, women need to have their own spaces too. Better if they all have a similar goal, being more fit, in common. I explained it was for her health, among other things.

Also I frequently "think" about women I find attractive, Its like an asthetic thing.

I wouldn't consider it being less faithful. Especially if the wife doesnt want to work on her self image. You prefer a land rover but get a Suzuki samauri. Why not look at the land rovers though?

maybe we do need a female perspective up in here?

@thedarkness05 eh, I think hardwiring still makes the software confused. I can have long talks with my wife on why things bother her and I still dont understand

Absolutely

Yeah, same. But I was coming more from the angle of how they might solve the isssue using things they might uniquely need

I also don't think women have as much drive to self improve for their own sake

@Bodark Actual theyve been told they're beautiful no matter what constantly and that love is unconditional

Neither are true

So when that reality hitsem, kinda shattering

So the way I framed it, was I took something she really wanted (Not a physical object), and put it behind the stipulation you get X when you do Y, because....
And then I constantly do that encouraging thing

@thedarkness05 I'm lost

Resplain that

Both got that?

Yep

cool. So now you gotta find that thing that really motivates her and keep driving it