I typed this up elsewhere so i'll just copypasta here

this dude from the screenshot
was bitching to me about how he didn't have any pussy
and how he wanted some pussy

so i was like ok pfc lets go get you some pussy
he had just gotten his drivers license the week before
so i tell him lets take his car and drive to barnes and nobles

cause that's where all the non complete whores were around base

and yes i know in retrospect picking up women at barnes and nobles isn't the best look in the world but grunt life is grunt life and you make do
and a nigga wanted some poon

we don't even get off of base
when a cop(not mp he was a contracted civie one) pulls us over for going way over the speed limit
cop asks my private why he was speeding and i tell the cop we're going to barnes and nobles
cop asks private if this is true and why he's going to barnes and nobles
and my private says, and I quote "ah shit goin there to get some pussy, officer"

i'm sitting there like
what the fuck
officer gives this weird look and is like "what"
and then asks the private who is first line is
and then the private is like "oh right here it's cpl pillarman"
and i'm like uhhhhhhhhhhhhh
"we;re going there to get the ranger handbook officer"

i don't say anything else and the officer just looks at the both of us like we're absolute retards
and just is like don't let it happen again and we drive off

I ask the private why the fuck he said that and the private said "soldiers don't lie"

i had no response to him

We get to barnes and nobles and he finds some weirdo ugly chick and tries hitting on her and gets pepper sprayed and starts crying

and then i have to drive him back and we pass by the same cop that pulled us over who gave us this really weird look

after that i called him a retard and told him to go away
God man privates are fuckin wierd

that's the story

fuck boots

and fuck zoomers

You lose your brain in basic or boot camp

no you don't

i did stupid shit but i was never this retarded

It was a joke dude

bruh i gotta deal with 30 iq brainlets on the regular this is just my life now

I met some stupid boots though, I was a stupid boot at one point lol

But god damn

whenever i get a slightly older pri I am so much happier

because i don't have to hold their hands

or babysit them

Thanks that qas glorious to read

i'm sure you have similar stories

boots are boots

Id have to think

Bruh, and I thought I dealt with the lowwest common denominator. But shit dude, I dont envy you

@P I L L A R M A N lmfao

God my sides are in orbit

"Soldiers don't lie" mf has obviously never heard of the sham n skate

Lol nice story

Are 2 and 1 point combo slings worth it?

Viking tac is best sling

I will yeet you into the beyond

What plate carriers you guys use? I fucking hate my condor one. Worst $80 I ever spent.

ospray mk3 or mk4 are great surplus vest but mk4 is better