oo

Oh

Now do a critique of mine

Hehehehehe

Hold on, gimme a minute.

I like the interactions but am a bit lost on who is who. Maybe adding some visual description to each of the people; introduce them through their position in the room?

The "confession" would be great

on this I mean

Aaaaa

Is the confession a gay love confession?

spoilers bro

<:KEK:795742276549607456> <:KEK:795742276549607456> <:KEK:795742276549607456>

yes

Yeah

definitely avoid that in the beginning; it feels like we just met the characters

95% possible

<:KEK:795742276549607456> <:KEK:795742276549607456>

5% not

unless the story starts with that, a la Crazy Rich Asians

Yep

94-95% possible

<:KEK:795742276549607456> <:KEK:795742276549607456> <:KEK:795742276549607456>

I'd have the relationship be pre-existing in that case. At least have them be friends perhaps? I can't imagine going over to someone's house on a first meeting

Summary: There is this one dude pretending to be broke and realized he was rich

Yep sure

Thats the friend stage <:KEK:795742276549607456>

Yah ill do it on my notepad

like legit that's how people disappear

Yea

I'm originally a wattpad writer

Because LMAO

I write angst

And sad stuff

that last part was really funny

is it just bits and pieces of the whole story?

I'll write the full one tho

But not here

😆

My advise on angst and sad stuff, having written it for a very long time (I had a couple fanfictions myself, lol. Someone get me a William Dafoe meme of that.) - don't do it for the sake of sadness and angst. Being edgy is something that comes of as incredibly cheap and cheap tear jerkers are subject to much more criticism

Ye lol

I made a story once