and i saw myself becoming him

despite my conscious effort to never be that way. Forgive your parents so God can forgive you

That is so true.

He will reward you for it - He will take that all away

no matter how hard i tried I couldnt do what i wanted through my own will

i forced myself to stop dating just because i saw that pattern repeating

dating a girl for sex and then getting angry over and over

i felt like i was hurting them, and i was

and i thought about them the same way i thought about my mom

oh she's so good, ill just listen to her, and make her feel good

but letting a woman lead you is like putting a baby in the driver's seat

dont get me wrong, women are great for a lot of things, but not leadership

Ye because they are emotional.

Will think about this. Tho it makes me sad that I have to visit my parents again, I might give it a try.

it's totally worth it

it's the last time you will feel fear again

and it is very likely going to be very scary leading up to it

I tell them that I forgive them for x and y and z and all they done, right?

think about it, but dont think too much

And then I go away.

i think forgive them in your heart first

so before you go there

1. acknowledge the wrongs, whatever you can think of, and 2. understand how if they knew better they would have done better

They might kick me out of the house 2.0 XD

(they kicked me out once, lel)

so be it

you can't be scared of that

Ye

on the other side is freedom and love

you will get your life back

and you're doing this out of love

this isnt you going there to lay down judgement

I am scared of violence tho cuz my dad used to be a very violent man

if anything its to remove the judgement that you've been holding onto all this time

I understand.

Seems fair.

i wish you the best man, feel free to message me if you want

dont listen to those thoughts

thats the devil

the doubts and fears and consequences, etc

Thank you, bro in Christ