agreed

all i have is 1 guy and this server
which is odd because big servers tend to be extremely offputting

@Rhyean Yeah the social paranoia is always something. I try to move forward bit by bit, taking every reaction dead serious. It sucks feeling like you walked into a social fail

hell id love to make friends with like anyone but at the same time I'll just end up fucking something or everything up so i just don't bother

plus if i try to make friends myself i seem like a desperate loser

I remember my first major interaction in this server was when i accidentally pinged all the mods

HOW

whoops

i think Froski remembers

Hahahahahahahaha

> Idk I’ve never found the ability to create/hold back and forth conversation with people face to face and social skills and stuff
@SmokyCopCar hmmm, i figured it out because I was in MUN (like a debate clube) and we had to do public speaking and meet-and-greet. But, i guess one way is just bulldozing through. I hate it when I'm the one initiating the conversation, but you've to push through that. finding common ground is a good way to start. smile a lot and look like you're super happy to be talking to them

it was during the last mod rotation

Funnily enough my first major interaction was a warn

i guess my first major one would be the fuckin thing we just did

With the mod team at that time

> @SmokyCopCar hmmm, i figured it out because I was in MUN (like a debate clube) and we had to do public speaking and meet-and-greet. But, i guess one way is just bulldozing through. I hate it when I'm the one initiating the conversation, but you've to push through that. finding common ground is a good way to start. smile a lot and look like you're super happy to be talking to them
@isoboto I guess not having good social skills and years of bullying combined makes for a crappy combo growing up

with me showing a bunch of old shit of my own

yeah

definitely

@isoboto I tried bulldozing through, but felt like shit afterwards

> plus if i try to make friends myself i seem like a desperate loser
@Rhyean you don't have to force yourself to make friends. i isolated myself with study and works during grade 9 and 10 (i was a stiff) and somehow still wind up with a handful of people. have a good work ethics may help you. once people start familiarize with you it's easy to bridge the gap

> @Rhyean you don't have to force yourself to make friends. i isolated myself with study and works during grade 9 and 10 (i was a stiff) and somehow still wind up with a handful of people. have a good work ethics may help you. once people start familiarize with you it's easy to bridge the gap
@isoboto work ethic is definitely an advantage I have

Work ethic = Yes

Social = No

i know man but its just
im so fucking lonely
and kts not like i dont deserve to be either
who would willingly want to be friends with me lol

I need to shut up holy shit I just realized

I sound like the biggest fucking loser

> Work ethic = Yes
@mightytrump I’ve been raised on the tried an true concept of you contribute nothing you get nothing, if you do something you’ll get something

Paid off now that I’m slightly older and have a job and stuff

@SmokyCopCar Good for you, but I take the latter VERY slowly due to seeing things like my dad tackle and scream at my eldest brother at 6 y/o

Scared the hell out of me

> @isoboto I tried bulldozing through, but felt like shit afterwards
@mightytrump that's common, especially if you've the habit of reviewing your days or agonizing over the mistakes you made. you'll have to learn to tamp it down, as in not letting the miniscule mistakes haunt you. one thing about growing up is you learn to know which mistake is critical and should be learn from and what needs to be let go. remember, there are a trillion info your brain needs to process. the only reason why you aren't going crazy is your brain filtered noises out. you'll have to manually build in those filters -- which will take times -- but once you start being to feel in control of your life (or being able to control small aspect of it) you know you're on the right path

Just gonna slip this in here. You know... just cause

Oh

Sorry

> Paid off now that I’m slightly older and have a job and stuff
@SmokyCopCar If me and my friends move into a house, as in all 5-6 of us, we'd probably end up pitching into the house together, and whoever bought it gets to skip paying until the others have paid the equivalent of the house

inb4 work ethic = suicide

> @SmokyCopCar If me and my friends move into a house, as in all 5-6 of us, we'd probably end up pitching into the house together, and whoever bought it gets to skip paying until the others have paid the equivalent of the house
@ThiccSpicyGenderRevealParty seems fair

> I sound like the biggest fucking loser
@Rhyean well. i don't like it when people apologize and start going "i'm a loser" route. i like being realistic but not too harsh. if you think your life is not going toward where you want, dissect it down into elements you can and cannot control, and figure out which one you want to start changing first. (ie. i'm terrible at keeping up with schedules. i broke it into weekly task and also daily task so i've the flexibility to move around. as long as i got 80% of things done I'd consider it productive. I know i'm also a bit of an attention hog. I'll share my daily schedule to my friends and report it to them). Your problem may be a bit more complex, but like solving equations, one step at a time

The first step to gaining confidence is to stop being extremely apologetic

> Just gonna slip this in here. You know... just cause
@jerpeau oh yeah, obligatory disclaimer: take everything with a grain of salt. we're not there to actually evaluate the situation objectively and all of your recount is biased. So do your own evaluation of your situation and decide accordingly