It made me want to end my life

I felt watched and judged

I felt as though I had no privacy

I saw God to be more like Big Brother from 1984

Kind of crazy the amount of pain one goes through can make someone want to end their own life

God forgives

you are being watched and judged, and not just by spiritual beings. privacy is a lie to get your guard down. accept that you are on a stage and realize that it brings stability and closure to what you thought was a random and unpredictable world

Well

This convo is making me depressed

Life is depressing

S--t happens

i can’t even go outside without nature constantly reminding me that theres more than meets the eye. its reassuring to me, because the thought of some random, pointless death is what causes true fear. knowing you’re being watched makes you feel like a protagonist rather than an NPC

It seems a lot less s--t happened just a couple years ago

The fact that there is no afterlife gives me closure

No afterlife sounds depressing

without judgement then evil would win without consequence. i couldn’t bear knowing that everyone who fought for truth and good died for nothing and that evil would never see justice, what a horrifying thought

Evil does win

Evil is everywhere

It wins some and loses some

There's a reason why nice guys finish last

As conspiracy theorists you guys should be well aware of that

*Ignores WW1 AND WW2*

the devil does his job well, what you gain in this world isn’t what matters, nor does it bring the happiness you think it will

Would saint maximilian ever sacrifice his life in the Holocaust if he knew there was no afterlife?

That's a question I dont want the answer to

You don't know is there is or isn't a afterlife

We don't have proof of such thing existing

People who come back say it's real

the creator isn’t going to let his favorite creations openly defy him and kill all those who respect him without consequence. this is obviously a test, this insane level of lies and deceit would never have been victorious unless the creator let it happen as a test. as it happens, the prophecies all predicted it. its all part of the plan

But is always denied by BUT HE WAS RELIGIOUS

People have said they have seen jesus

truth is more beautiful in a world of lies. light shines brighter in darkness. the creator is an artist, he understands contrast. like a good song, or a good story, we’re in the conflict stage so the climax will be greater for it.

this duality is evident in everything, maybe that’s why artists are always spiritual/religious, because they recognize that our existence is extremely artistic

the protagonist vs the world, its the story everyone wants to read, and its the story the creator wrote. just relax, play your part, exit the stage knowing you’ll come back. personally, i’m a believer in universalism. i believe everyone will be punished, and purified, and that it will be painful for them, but that its a refining process that will purify them afterwards relative to how bad we were. i don’t believe eternal punishment is the eye for an eye that God spoke of. how is temporary sin paid for with eternal suffering? i think we’re all going to get to come back and see the whole story together, truthfully, for the first time. i think when we’re done, we’ll get to watch more stories, again and again, forever. we might even get to make our own

I drew in the past when I was an atheist it is not all artist there are religious

i didn’t just mean literal artists, but more as a metaphor for creativity in general, storytelling and artistic merit throughout all mediums. the ability to see patterns and beauty and duality in life. even the evil in this world can see that

a natural human trait that psychology explains away as a “mistake” or “coincidence.” don’t believe those excuses for a second, we see patterns because we were made in the image of a creator who designs via patterns and motifs and themes, like a song or a story

Oh okay
I get you now

Not really focusing that much as I am doing multiple things at once XD

And I am going shopping for plants with my sister now as well
As I need more plants lol