apparently wet wipes work well

I tried spit once

didn't work

wet wipes are a nightmare in the toil-

what

what happened

just not enough

this is a whole new world for me

how'd you spit on your shitter brah

I spat on the tp

this was yesterday actually

HAHAHAHA

just an experiment really

cause it was the theatre toilet

and I had to go a bit urgently

in that situation I just white-man-wipe

and your findings were inconclusive? you must reexamine your methods and attempt with more copious saliva?

yes?

and clean up later

its difficult to get enough watery saliva to do the job

see fallot

you can get a good amount out once

but you need more than once

you've spoilt me

because if i white man wipe

i feel fucking filthy

yeah

like allah is displeased

same

well, not that

just that I have shit on me

like what if you got shit on your face

would you wipe it with toilet paper

and call it a day?

but the only other person that knows I am walking around smearing poop on my britches is God

...and maybe my gf if it's particularly bad

i got shit on my glasses one time

and kept smelling shit

and couldn't figure out where it was

also, I've found white people smell a certain way

yeah?