Message from @fallot
Discord ID: 300280422011633664
I hate it
it's the opposite of what is true and good
well seriously, you could benefit from knowing me quite a bit
success in life, this is a meaningless thing without truth, beauty, the real things
real souls, real people, making real choices
also what you feel towards me is exactly what I feel towards accountt and yarfy, or at least I did before I improved
and not just damaged automatons benefiting themselves materially
you are essentially upset that you cannot connect with my motives or feel like I am close to you
to be honest I don't actually pity you in the sense that I feel an emotion
you feel as though I am "not letting you in"
and that bugs the shit out of you
I know you aren't, that much isn't a feeling
it doesn't bug me per se
yeah it does
what bugs me is whether there is anything inside
there's a whole world
yeah, but what's it worth
more than the real world
that's why it's in there locked away
let me contrast you to Ludvig
ok
when I talk to Ludvig, there is some diffidence
and "not letting me in"
but its qualitatively different from what you are talking about
he himself is not aware of the things he doesn't "let me in"
other than that, he is completely true
a pure soul, you don't meet many of them
whatever problems or hangups he has in his life, he will overcome them at some level because of that
and: importantly
GROW
he has the capability of growth
whereas in your case, that possibility is immediately excluded
because there is a thick wall between you and truth/goodness/love/whatever
the collective consciousness of man
god
whatever you want to call it
not only can you not grow, you'll call whatever prevents you from growing a good thing
and maybe even see it as a good thing
now this is speculation, MAYBE there is a part of you that understands this in some weak fashion
actually you have a point