**gnome**: Short, stocky little people with big noses, beards, blue tunics, and red pointy hats. Once related to dwarves but got much shorter and weirder. During a war with goblins, when the dwarves were having a box shortage, the gnomes went off to look for a better life. Unfortunately, many were captured and made as slaves, tending [the gardens] of dumb suburban people. Some managed to escape, only to be [eeking] out a living in the woods and living in burrow-like homes, like those of hobbits. Worse yet, they had been cursed by an evil tract-house developer to freeze into a clay form when a human sees them. Despite this, they are occasionally stolen by certain creepy [french girls]. Lately, a few gnomes were free of the curse and appear to be traveling around the world, sending back silly [postcards] with their mugs on them. Sadly, one gnome was crushed to death by a 2000 pound ball of baked [pizza dough] covered with melted cheese. A wrongful-death lawsuit with the Domino's Pizza Corporation is pending.
*[Thank's] to that french jr. high foreign-exchange bitch, my [gnome's] in Tokyo on the god-damn [bullet train]! Junior - mow the lawn! Where's the phone book...I want some pizza!....*
*(<http://gnome.urbanup.com/521555>)* *9 more results*
