Where you just sit there patiently and wait for the last [cling-on] to drop off because if you wipe now, it's going to smear all over the place.
*"[AW SHIT]"

"I [have to] [take a shit]"*
*(<http://shit.urbanup.com/1479109>)* *9 more results*

-df shit

**shit**: 1. One of the most popular swear/cuss/curse words/profanities

2. another word Feces. Poop. Dookie. Scheisse. Poo Poo. Brownies.

The Shit List:

The Ghost Shit
The kind where you feel shit come out, see shit on the toilet paper, but there's no shit in the bowl.

[The Clean Shit]
The kind where you feel shit come out, see shit in the bowl, but there's no shit on the toilet paper.

[The Wet Shit]
You wipe your ass fifty times and it still feels unwiped. So you end up putting toilet paper between your ass and your underwear so you don't ruin them with those dreadful skid marks.

The Second Wave Shit
This shit happens when you've finished, your pants are up to your knees, and you suddenly realize you have to shit some more.

The Brain Hemorrahage Through Your [Nose Shit]
Also known as "Pop a Vein in Your Forehead Shit". You have to strain so much to get it out that you turn purple and practically have a stroke.

The Corn Shit
No explanation necessary.

The [Lincoln Log] Shit
The kind of shit that's so enormous you're afraid to flush it down without first breaking it up into little pieces with the toilet brush.

The Nororius Drinker Shit
The kind of shit you have the morning after a long night of drinking. It's most noticeable trait is the tread mark left on the bottom of the toilet bowl after you flush.

The "Gee, I Really Wish I Could Shit" Shit
The kind where you want to shit, but even after straining your guts out, all you can do is sit on the toilet, cramped and farting.

The Wet Cheeks Shit
Also known as the "[Power Dump]". That's the kind that comes out of your ass so fast that your butt cheeks get splashed with the toilet water.

The Liquid Shit
That's the kind where yellowish-brown liquid shoots out of your butt, splashes all over the side of the toilet bowl and, at the same time, chronically burns your tender [poop-chute].

The Mexican Food Shit
A class all on its own.

The Crowd Pleaser
This shit is so intriguing in size and/or appearance that you have to show it to someone before flushing.

The Mood Enhancer
This shit occurs after a lengthy period of constipation, thereby allowing you to be your old self again.

The Ritual
This shit occurs at the same time each day and is accomplished with the aid of a newspaper.

The Guinness Book Of Records Shit
A shit so noteworthy it should be recorded for future generations.

[The Aftershock] Shit
This shit has an odour so powerful than anyone entering the vicinity within the next seven hours is affected.

The "[Honeymoon's Over]" Shit
This is any shit created in the presence of another person.

[The Groaner]
A shit so huge it cannot exit without vocal assistance.

[The Floater]
Characterized by its floatability, this shit has been known to resurface after many flushings.

The Ranger
A shit which refuses to let go. It is usually necessary to engage in a rocking or bouncing motion, but quite often the only solution is to push it away with a small piece of toilet paper.

The Phantom Shit
This appears in the toilet mysteriously and no one will admit to putting it there.

[The Peek-A-Boo] Shit
Now you see it, now you don't. This shit is playing games with you. Requires patience and muscle control.

The Bombshell
A shit that comes as a complete surprise at a time that is either inappropriate to shit (i.e. during lovemaking or a root canal) or you are nowhere near shitting facilities.

[The Snake Charmer]
A long [skinny shit] which has managed to coil itself into a frightening position - usually harmless.

The Olympic Shit
This shit occurs exactly one hour prior to the start of any competitive event in which you are entered and bears a close resemblance to the [Drinker's] Shit.

The Back-To-Nature Shit

This shit may be of any variety but is always deposited either in the woods or while hiding behind the passenger side of your car.

The Pebbles-From-Heaven Shit
An adorable collection of small turds in a cluster, often a gift from God when you actually can't shit.

[Premeditated Shit]
Laxative induced. Doesn't count.

[Shitzopherenia]
Fear of shitting - can be fatal!

[Energizer] Vs. [Duracell] Shit
Also known as a "Still Going" shit.

[The Power Dump] Shit
The kind that comes out so fast, you barely get your pants down when you're done.

The [Liquid Plumber] Shit
This kind of shit is so big it plugs up the toilet and it overflows all over the floor. (You should have followed the advice from the Lincoln Log Shit.)

[The Spinal Tap] Shit
The kind of shit that hurts so much coming out, you'd swear it's got to be coming out sideways.

The "I Think I'm Giving Birth Through My Asshole" Shit
Similar to the Lincoln Log and The Spinal Tap Shits. The shape and size of the turd resembles a tall boy beer can. Vacuous air space remains in the rectum for some time afterwards.

The Porridge Shit
The type that comes out like toothpaste, and just keeps on coming. You have two choices: a) flush and keep going, or b) risk it piling up to your butt while you sit there helpless.

The "I'm Going To Chew My Food Better" Shit
When the bag of Doritos you ate last night lacerates the insides of your rectum on the way out in the morning.

The "I Think I'm Turning Into A Bunny" Shit
When you drop lots of cute, little [round ones] that look like marbles and make tiny splashing sounds when they hit the water.

The "What The Hell Died In Here?" Shit
Also sometimes referred to as "The [Toxic Dump]". Of course you don't warn anyone of the poisonous bathroom odour. Instead, you stand innocently near the door and enjoy the show as they run out gagging and gasping for air.

The "I Just Know There's A Turd Still Dangling There" Shit

Where you just sit there patiently and wait for the last [cling-on] to drop off because if you wipe now, it's going to smear all over the place.
*"[AW SHIT]"

"I [have to] [take a shit]"*
*(<http://shit.urbanup.com/1479109>)* *9 more results*

-df jezzabean

Put your dick in your pants

**Jezzabean**: A Jezzabean is someone who is an [idiot]. Not a [swear word] but a word of [disrespect].
*[Harry] is a [jezzabean]*
*(<http://jezzabean.urbanup.com/12950420>)*

-df science

**science**: [Something] [that works], [bitches].
*[Bonus points] if you can identify [the science] [being used].*
*(<http://science.urbanup.com/4182009>)* *9 more results*

-df elliot hill

**Elliot**: Elliot is a true master at caring. He teaches how to love and be loved. A man of honour a man of steal. He's as handsome as a Greek God, as strong as diamond, as compassionate as a saint and is as gentle as [a father's] touch. Elliot possesses a magic within to create a vision in the eyes of all, leaving them stunned at how brilliant and perfect Elliot truly is. A leader, a [spirit lifter], a lover, a giver, an Elliot'll leave you speechless with his being, his essence.

Life isn't complete without an Elliot. Once you meet him, he will take your concerns away and replace them with peace, [tranquility] and love. This is the magic that is he. An Elliot brings out the best in everything and everyone he touches, and makes the world simply a better place to be.

An Elliot will render your [dark days] with light,
An Elliot will give a selfless comfort to make all things
bright.
He will bring the moon to where the sun lies.
In a heart beat he can turn a sunset into a sun rise.
An Elliot is someone who gives the gift of love,
and from that day onwards he will be your all, beyond and above.
An Elliot will give a strength a hope,
Taking your hand and helping all [cope].
An inspiration a muse
Once Elliot touches a heart, it can't ever refuse.

An Elliot is to create a phenomenon in which a delicate blend of awesomeness, love, compassion, [humility], inner an [outer beauty], charisma, charity, strength, passion, security and wonder merge to create the amazement that he will forever be
*[A magician] of his nature, my [companion], can only be an Elliot.

What an amazing man... the love heart link was for you, [darling] Elliot.

Awesomeness of this kind, can only be an Elliot.

A man loved dearly, he is Elliot.*
*(<http://elliot.urbanup.com/4989528>)* *9 more results*

-df allah

**Allah**: The [Arabic] word for [God]. Not only the [Islamic] God, but any God.
*[Oh] Allah [help me].*
*(<http://allah.urbanup.com/11692275>)* *9 more results*

-df allah Akbar

-df John

**Allah Akbar**: Last thing u hear after Mrs [frizzle] "accidentally" crashes [the magic school bus] into [the twin] towers
*[HOLLY] $[HIT] *[ALLAH AKBAR]*!!!!*
*(<http://allah-akbar.urbanup.com/9727101>)* *9 more results*

**John**: John is infinite and multi-faceted. He is generally a level headed person but when he comes [under pressure] and is compelled to make a decision thats when things get [vexed].

John is tall has brown hair and a tan, perfect skin and blue/green eyes that hold many secrets. John has great legs and nice muscles. John is a kind compassonate individual. He is a man of complete integrity and [exemplary] manners. He is a man of little words, believing that his actions will speak louder than words. He has a dynamic [work ethic]. He is strong, handsome, sexy and beautiful. He is intelligent, funny, loyal, trustworthy, full of charisma, loving, teasing, sweet and thoughtful.

John always likes to plan and think ahead for the most part. John strives to do things for the better, hardly selfish, [observant] and loves his family.

He leads a very intense life and proves himself [hardy] in doing so.

A guy that is outgoing and friendly. Everyone knows of him but he keeps very few close friends. Shy and quiet but usually willing to open up to you when you get to know him and he knows he can trust you. Then he can tell you what is on his mind and can be very emotional which does bring about his true feelings.

John has a playful side to him when he feels [at ease] with someone that he befriends. He can then be a total [goof]! Once you befriend John he will be your friend for life. He is loved more than he'll ever realize.

John is simply like the Heavens above, SUPREME BLISS.

Tender Kisses
*[Joyce]: "Why are you [smiling]?"

Girl : " I'm smiling because I have [a John] in my life."*
*(<http://john.urbanup.com/7034945>)* *9 more results*

-df STOP BOT

**bot-bot**: Austrialian slang for [bottom], [ass] or a person you [refer] as ass.
*Those [young] bot-bots [make me] [mad]!*
*(<http://bot-bot.urbanup.com/3856936>)* *9 more results*

-df SHUT UPPPP

**shut**: the only [possible] [response] to [no u]
*1: [Ur mum] tripel [gey]
2: [no u]
1: shut*
*(<http://shut.urbanup.com/12630150>)* *9 more results*

-df Allahu akbar

**allahu akbar**: Literally "God is great" in Arabic. Nice thought, however...

what is said by people [beheading] [hogtied] victims "in the name of God"

or what is said by someone in a [carbomb] seconds before he fires it off in a crowded marketplace.
*"Wait for that grandmother with her three cute [grandkids] gets a bit closer"

"[ALLAHU AKBAR]!!!"

KA-BLAM!!! ... screams, [wailing], etc*
*(<http://allahu-akbar.urbanup.com/4348226>)* *9 more results*

-df Ching

**Ching**: [Slang] in [London] for [stabbing] someone
*‘Yo bro [come we] go lurk for that west batty boy that violated earlier’

‘Bmt I’ll ching him down [in the mains] I don’t [give a toss]’

‘*
*(<http://ching.urbanup.com/13104225>)* *9 more results*

-df pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis

**pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis**: An inflammation of the lungs caused by microscopic [grains] of certain types of rock.

*NOTE* This word was actually coined in a deliberate attempt to be [the longest word] in the english language, although you would be [hard-pressed] to find it in the language dictionary as it is a medical/scientific term.
*"Dude, now that I've learned how to spell [antidisestablishmentarianism], what am I going to do to make people think [I'm smart]?"

"Quiet man, I'm trying to name this condition we discovered today. Its an inflammation of the lungs caused by microscopic [grains] of certain types of rock."

"Hey, I smell opportunity! How long could we make this word?"

"Pretty long...I suppose we could stretch it to pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis"*
*(<http://pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis.urbanup.com/3786340>)* *9 more results*

-df skeng

**skeng**: 1. A [weapon of choice]
2. [Whatever] you want it to [mean]
*[Jay]: t oiiiiii dropping [bare] skengs stilllll
[Romell]: oiiiiiiiiiiii*
*(<http://skeng.urbanup.com/14137800>)* *9 more results*

-df hong kong

**hong kong**: A [high tech] ghetto, Hong Kong is the best place in Asia. Home of tall buildings, neon, and pirates. Also a great place to pick up cheap anime dvds...

Hong Kong is a living example of [Gibson's] [cyberpunk] future.
*"If you think [Japan] is good, wait [till] you see [Hong Kong]"*
*(<http://hong-kong.urbanup.com/192490>)* *9 more results*

-df bing bong

**Bing Bong**: Bing Bong was a "term" used by President [Donald Trump] during one of his political speeches in order to [get elected]. Unfortunately the only thing is "term" [accomplished] was the creation of a meme, which has now seemed to have died off.
*[Donald Trump]: [Bing Bing] Bing Bong
Audience: *[Applause]**
*(<http://bing-bong.urbanup.com/12156742>)* *9 more results*

"ghetto"

Aha

-df ghetto

**ghetto**: When someone is to be described as "ghetto" - it is used to describe that persons STATE OF MIND. "Ghetto" can be both a noun and an adjective. So, in this case, it is used as an adjective where [white and Asian people] can be just as "ghetto" as black people. Normally, this results from the poor living and upbringing conditions. "Ghetto" is a derogatory term used towards individuals who lack the standards of manners and ethics.

For some reason, "ghetto" is normally directed towards black individuals. However, it is believed and has been proven that other individuals of a different color can and have acted just as poorly.

"Ghetto" is [NOT black] or [being black]. "Ghetto" is how an individual looks at the world and acts accordingly to the "ghetto" belief. "Ghetto" is how one presents themselves in how they dress, act, and speak that acquires itself from the poor conditionings of a "ghetto" (ref. ghetto-.noun) up-bringing.
*That girl/boy is [ghetto].

Why is she/he so ghetto?

That ghetto [bit]*h needs to [chill].

That ghetto bit*h needs to chill with all that [ghETto] tYpE.*
*(<http://ghetto.urbanup.com/3255724>)* *9 more results*

"pirates"

"cheap anime dvds"