Message from @asparkofpyrokravte
Discord ID: 521677187032678400
Alrighty
So there's a decent draft with hopefully a servicable introduction and conclusion
"And this opposition affects people's knowledge that the issues even exist. The executive order creating a white house council on women and girls said “When our daughters do not have the same educational and career opportunities as our sons...” No wonder the Canadian Council of Learning didn't find examples of US States addressing boys' issues in education. "
That bit still needs work
..
But otherwise, everyone, please tear this thing apart
@Men Are Human Additionally, has the article gone a bit off the rails from what you were hoping for?
Unless you say otherwise that should be pretty close to the final form of the thing
@InsaneCaterpilla How do you feel about the introduction in particular?
Idk, I find perhaps asking the same question basically twice at the start wrong, but maybe it's just me.
That's fair, I was rather challenged by trying to find something introductory for this. I saw your earlier suggestion but couldn't quite agree with the claims.
But I feel it'd have to be replaced with something
and I haven't a clue what
So Why do boys lag behind girls in academic achievement?
What is the article's title
A good introduction depends on the title
People will notice that you asked it twice. Beside anything else, it just *sounds* wrong
"Our sons are in a substatial disadvantage in our educational system and what can we do about it."
"Why do boys lag behind girls in academic achievement?" In the third paragraph I basically just say "it's complicated". I actually try not to address that, since a bunch of the reason boys lag behind girls has nothing to do with the school system. For instance, boys are more affected by poverty and fatherlessness than girls, boys have a harder time sitting still and with auditory learning. Boys are less motivated by the classroom environment as it is now than girls (but not necessarily by all classroom environments) partially because it just doesn't cater to boys and we're still figuring out the pedagogy thing. This affect seems to be larger in topics other than math and science. Boys are also apparently discriminated against.
In many cases we can't just "do this" and deal with the issues, which should be obvious from the issues mentioned in the 2nd paragraph
Perhaps I can incorporate some of what I just said into the introduction
but most of that is going to feel rather handwavey
and perhaps a little hard to cite
I could probably find a citation for boys being less suited to auditory learning
..
Secondly, the advantage, while substantial in impact on boys, is relatively slight. Relatively
It's a headline, it needs to get attention
Otherwise people won't click
it works out to boys being somewhere between 0.22 of a standard deviation behind, but that's over a large period of time, it might be smaller or larger if I were to try to find results for just the last decade
"what can we do about it" is a call to action and it works psychologicallly
I like that, and I also don't have a problem with answering "well, its complicated"
and then going into the details
thanks, I'll do that
That's a question I can ask. I'll use it to fix the double-question.
..
As for the title, that is harder
Right now my heading is simply "An Issue of Education", which on a site called menarehuman should be descriptive enough
But it might not be the best
In general practice, it's better to be more descriptive
Yeah, but how does one be more descriptive on what is effectively a rather broad research paper?