im gonna go cuddle with my body pillow while i listen to her speak for an hour

brb

wash up after

Wow she's so cute and so retarded

I'm in love

I wonder what my phone keeps sending to Google while I'm not using it 🤔

It's telling google that you're a bad, bad goy

it's cool, google knows anyone with sprint isn't worth spying on

Lol

They're pretty good when you've been with them for a decade

I had them for awhile until I took a job in a rural area with zero service

Whenever they try pulling one of their Jewish tricks just call to cancel and you get tons of free shit

i don't sign jewish contracts

Smfh he doesn't have the latest and greatest nigg tech contract

"upgrade" every year, goy!!

You lose micro SD and rf transmission, but the screen is bigger!!!

why would you need storage space goy, just put all your stuff on this nice fluffy (((cloud)))

I miss being able to turn off TV's at restaurants and coffee shops

rf signals activate my tay sachs sorry

Damn when I move in with that haircutting lady I'll need to switch providers

she asked if you could send some dick pics first, she's very thicc needs to know you can get the job done

Shit

It's highly unlikely

wew

if you want i can send her mine instead to stall for time

but eventually you'll have to figure something out

*squint*

Hmmm

Let me know when you and nanners get the guest bedroom set up

I'll show her the motion of my ocran

Ocean

don't call me i'll call you

Yeah that's what let me know means

Smfh

:^)

Tfw I will never be as alpha as Kyle Hunt

or mike

Hehe

How do I become a thought leader I want groupies

A thot leader, one might say

it's like porn you start with the guy on guy stuff and eventually you get girls