maybe if you threw a pork diet into it rofl

Or become the bikini-pinup face (and tit) girl for Obcene Uncle Alberts Pork Cracklings

If we want to keep it secular

Or! We could ship off half of southern England’s teenage chicks to join ISIS

Poor fuckers would be committing sepuku with the month

Dont talk shit about Essex girls

their plastic surgeons made me believe in god

there is no way a mere man can be so skilled as to produce some of those women

lol

Why? The two lying underneath me last night were begging me to talk shit about them

that is the only acceptable shit-talking case lol

And it only cost me two packets of crisps and a pint of vodka.
That’s 50% more expensive than two years ago mind you

Bloody immigrants driving the prices up

wait....these quotes are absurd on the second reading lol

When the locals see what real women charge they think they special

"Asked by Times journalist Anthony Loyd whether her experiences of living in the one-time IS stronghold of Raqqa had lived up to her aspirations, Ms Begum said: "Yes, it did. It was like a normal life. The life that they show on the propaganda videos - it's a normal life."

this is so stupid I actually think she is almost meming

She sounds she’s from Chelsea though

not at all. She sounds like a lot of their girls I have met from east london

You have to admit that it takes some guts and cunning to travel half way around the world to find a white boy who will make you his sex slave...

it really does! lol

I really have to admire this chick.
She knew what she wanted dammit, and she wasn’t going to find it in the fucking U.K.!!!!

because we dont want them rofl

Severed heads, entrails, nothing could deter her from her prey!!!

I love how they made the marriage part sound like it was alottery

"I applied for an english-speaking husband between the ages of 25-30"

I’ve changed my mind. She’s a dangerous beast. Relentless

rofl

what a brilliant fucking sentence lol

This is what happens when people dont have tinder apparently

We let he in, she’s going to become a triple agent

Lol

🤣🤣

its like the fucking ali baba of tinder rofl

🤯

if we let her in she is going to be involved in something eventually

Next plan: Dint invade , just drop 60 million iPhones with satellite uplink accounts and tinder loaded

Plan will fail though

just send them pictures of ladies ankles

We’ll find half of Germany and France invading there

The french arent very good at invading though