My second choice when we were car shopping was a fucking Toyota FJ Cruiser, lmao

So glad I wasn't forced to make that mistake

Yikes

I needed to help family move across the country, not everyone can be quietly detached from thier loved ones, Matty

Imagine dailying an fj cruiser

That would fit you...r personality

I liked the way it drove from when I worked at the rental company <:blobconfounded:427568418107949090>

Also, plastic interior makes cleaning a breeze, especially for kids and dogs

FJ cruisers are weird, like someone wanted a hummer but for some reason also wanted it to be sensible, not knowing the whole appeal of a hummer is that it's nonsensical

Also, THREE WINDSHIELD WIPERS

The humble drug dealer car

3 wiper blades to change everytime

Sounds amazing

I understand, not everyone is cut out for the 3 wiper life

Just buy six at once.

It'ss not like they go bad unless it gets w/o super up there in years

My dad is drunk texting me. This is cringe.

Thank God my dad can't text

Also he doesn't drink, so actually whatever

It's only like 7pm, man

It's 8 where he is.

And normally he doesn't drink at all.

He's celebrating a promotion, I suppose.

''Your Papa is now the assist director of one of the biggest conversation center this side of the Mississippi.''

Congratulations, think I'll get drunk with your dad

<:pepesmug:589101277879992339>

Feel free, John. I'm drunk too.

Very unfortunate, Matt.

It seems I've passed my alcoholism to you

<:blobconfounded:427568418107949090>

This is the first I've drank in 3 months. And unlike you, I'm not lying when I say that.

There was a moment of genuine hurt you don't believe me.

And a moment of shock that you do believe me. I haven't had a drop. Scared to, in case it brings my bladder infection back.

I thought that cleared up?

Asymptomatic =/= cured

>7pm
That's perfectly fine for a drink

After 12pm, it's ok to have a drink

It's fine to drink whenever, so long as it doesn't interfere with things you ought to be doing instead

I finished all my cleaning and chores for the day at 12:30 today, because I got up at 7

Time to make the rest of those Choco-PB pancakes, lads

Eat with jam and white cheese like a normal person