not that a discord server means shit about relevance

I think you are look at this from a more ideological stance

it isn't some ideological I abide by

it is how I am built

some are like me some are not

I'd say that our ideology is somewhat special

a character trait really

we don't even call it an ideology strictly

it's a worldview

what

are we talking about my ideology now?

irrelevant

not about your ideology

I'm talking about communism

it has its own philosophy

makes all things look different

not even my worldview. In some ways sure. Worldviews are dependent on factors in your life though. Things that shape it. Idk if I was shaped to be like this, or if it is more a natural state of personal wealth. Many people have many forms of wealth they wish to obtain.

some more malleable than others

some debatable as even a form of wealth

perspective changes that

but it is something you seek

things like having a ton of Instagram followers means a lot to me. Numbers. The way my mind works, validation of people comes with the amount of people under them or that respect them

"follow" them

in the literal since not the social media sense but that applies still

but you know, that's not just a number

I am the type of person that always checks subscriber counts on youtube

there are people behind it

I mean I know that

what does that really change though

I mean if I weren't seeing them as people it would change honestly

that is where the validation comes from

115k followers, that is at least 100k people

lel

but uhm

you aren't doing things that you like

wym?

you're doing things to make people like you

to an extent yes

I mean I don't live to make people like me

I live to be known

which btw, is a trait common amongst school shooters and tyrants who commit genocide lol