half of the coral reefs in the entire world have died in MY lifetime

i'm only 30

So? You wear coral necklaces or something?

no, i just like to be able to eat food.

Whatever dies get replaced by something new. The planet (i.e. God) knows what it's doing.

i'm not rolling those dice

Like those microbes they discovered that can metabolize plastic.

it's my job, that's why he gave me testicles.

If the weather gets weird and the eart's surface becomes uninhabitable we'll just move to underwater cities and grow sea-cabbages and shit

Adapt. Improvise. Overcome.

That's why we apex predator #1 nigga

i'll just fix it myself

sea cabbage doesn't sound very tasty. i prefer a nice medium rare porterhouse.

we'll agriculturalize manatees. It'll taste the same

I for one look forward to the waterworld future. I've already got plans on starting a submarine racing league

i'll join.

i'll be the first black man to race submarines!!!!

There's so much uncharted territory... people all whining about a little spec of earth getting a little warm... boo hoo.

i'll have a day in febuary to commerate my accomplishment.

I'll bet these same people have never hangglided once in their life.

but on a real tip i'm not playing around with that at all. i aint cryin about it but if no one else wants to do something i will. i'll start when i get employed by the washington state department of fish and wildlife.
No AOC S%$# though.

My submarine's gonna have neon ground effects.

You should be the cool park ranger who lets people come in and hunt out of season.

no, that's when the people hunting season starts.

Let them take their big ol buggies with mud-paddles through protected marshes

I want to be the guy who cooks the last of a species and eats it. Find me an albino tiger or some spotted owl and I'll roast that mother and serve it with a nice chianti

we got the owls

they are actually making a comeback

dammit

see? nature finds a way

Ethic is for the weak in this world

It's a jungle out there

And those willing to sacrifice progress for feelings are unfit for survival

Ethic has nothing to do with feels. It's about doing what's right.

Uh huh

Excet

Except*

Santa's gonna put coal in your stocking bro

irl, no one cares

Your parents should have spanked you more