I used to be very Christian

believe it or not

humble yourself, get on your knees and pray to Him. tell Him you need revelation to continue the faith b/c you are losing it

ask for it

he'll show

I did,actually

a lot of times. I went to church more. I prayed for my confusing feelings to stop for many years

I told God I would deny them

And that I wouldn't doubt God's existence

but it never stopped

the last time I prayed was when I was crying in a public bathroom down on my knees pleading for a sign

and i looked everywhere for god but he wasn't there

He's always there, especially for the contrite spirit

then why didn't show then?

it would have changed everything for me

keep trying. be thankful and think about His creation. tell him what you are thankful for, and what is glorious, then ask again for revelation. He will deliver

no he won't

he really won't

you need to know he will

because he isn't there

and he was never there

and that's what Ill believe until I see otherwise

that's the attitude I had

he showed me nothing

until my friend died and he made an exception

He knows your heart

then he knows I'm done

that's what free will is for

I don't believe in hell but I guess to you I'm burning in hell for all of eternity

your path leads there, it has nothing to do with what i think

I guess think when you die you die

but I'm willing to give religion another chance

this mortal cursed body dies

you continue

maybe I'll try mormonism

mormons think you end up on your own planet

cool

and that God is on planet Kolob having endless celestial sex

and Lucifer and Jesus are brothers

even better

and black people are cursed because they didn't take sides in the war