Message from @fallot
Discord ID: 302162095351267331
his capacity for friendship is immature as he is so emotionally withdrawn, but I think I can safely say yes, he is my friend back
you both will be stunted in this realm
probably him more than you
he and I are becoming such similar people that he seems like he cannot help but be a friend to me
I am not stunted at all in that realm
I have extremely close friendships with several people
I meant emotions rather than friendships
elaborate, I'm listening
well, the basic issue is some kind of trauma in childhood usually
at which point the child
in defense
ensconces away with true personality
beyond a layer of narcissistic defense
what this means though is that emotional development essentially ceases outside of chance development
the true self remains stuck as that child
any growth, incidental
the defenses are iron, but since they aren't authentic, they can't actually hold
so they are constantly replaced, depending on stimulus
if that is not possible, attack is used
yes, which I know I do
for some people, it's impossible
they will never do it
and unfortunately this whole thing is a vicious cycle of positive feedback
to you it will seem a jolly good idea to double down on what people may perceive as your faults
the only way out is painful, it's diminishing
but after it's done, true growth can occur
you're not a dumb guy, I'm sure you know why you are as you are
I won't poke into it
it's your business
but IF you want to truly be yourself and be comfortable with yourself, and actually have some true worth that doesn't crumble away to ash and needs to be covered up by various crazy antics
you've got to come to terms with it, and you've got to come to terms with how you are now being bad
bad for you, and bad in general
no excuses
murica
sometimes you just gotta have that burg
hahahahahaha
wait wait
I think you can do it @Deleted User 57835c2c there are people way worse off than you
I am not certain why what I keep locked up inside needs to change if I can deal with my life as is