Message from TheGreatShiniGami in Realism #general

2017-05-13 21:19:17 UTC  


2017-05-13 21:19:23 UTC  

Every effort always fails.

2017-05-13 21:19:50 UTC  

No exceptions. It's a trend that's followed me my entire life. Everything only works out just enough to keep me alive and keep me too cowardly to kill myself.

2017-05-13 21:20:04 UTC  

Ouch, I didn't ask to feel

2017-05-13 21:20:05 UTC  

Plus the Mexican Standoff about that with Mother doesn't help anything.

2017-05-13 21:20:17 UTC  

Don't feel then. It's not like it's worth you feeling over.

2017-05-13 21:20:32 UTC  

It's just how things are. That's why I call the world a place of punishment.

2017-05-13 21:22:51 UTC  

Well.. The last medicine combination that a psychiatrist put me on ultimately numbed/dulled everything, including the fear of failing a suicide attempt. Tried, nearly succeeded but of course not quite. They were able to resuscitate. Now the fear is tenfold while everything becomes more miserable and difficult to bear.

2017-05-13 21:23:05 UTC  

Shrinks are all Jews, Marxists or Marxist Jews.

2017-05-13 21:23:51 UTC  

I've been in therapy before, and nothing has helped in any way. No medication ever fixed anything, it just made it more of a monotonous, hopeless grind rather than apocalyptic doom.

2017-05-13 21:23:53 UTC  

Yeah, which is why I haven't returned to one. Been two years or so now

2017-05-13 21:24:18 UTC  

Like I said. This world is a place of punishment.

2017-05-13 21:24:53 UTC  

It'll get better. Has to, right? :^)

2017-05-13 21:24:59 UTC  

No, it doesn't.

2017-05-13 21:25:16 UTC  

And no, it doesn't. It only gets worse. Nothing ever gets better, at least from where I'm standing it doesn't.

2017-05-13 21:25:22 UTC  

Slight sarcasm there..

2017-05-13 21:25:31 UTC  

I figured. It's an automatic response at this point.

2017-05-13 21:25:55 UTC  

Even if someone says something sarcastically, if it makes the Voices scream, it prompts a response.

2017-05-13 21:26:14 UTC  


2017-05-13 21:26:17 UTC  

Oh no

2017-05-13 21:26:31 UTC  


2017-05-13 21:26:52 UTC  

Yeah, I have a condition. No, I'm not going to go Dylan Roof, that accomplishes nothing and only furthers suffering.

2017-05-13 21:28:41 UTC  

As long as you're self-aware.

2017-05-13 21:28:57 UTC  

I am. Why else would I say that I'm a loser and failure?

2017-05-13 21:29:15 UTC  

My results speak for me. It's a painful awareness.

2017-05-13 21:30:49 UTC  

I want to hug you, friendo

2017-05-13 21:31:08 UTC  


2017-05-13 21:31:15 UTC  

Physical contact is cringe.

2017-05-13 21:31:51 UTC  

It's just another part of the condition.

2017-05-13 21:31:59 UTC  

A place of punishment.

2017-05-13 21:32:24 UTC  

Hmm, no contact at all? That's rough

2017-05-13 21:32:33 UTC  

Well, *physical*

2017-05-13 21:32:58 UTC  

For the most part man, people don't want to have anything to do with me after a certain point. It's just how events play out.

2017-05-13 21:33:17 UTC  

Maybe what I should have said is, "I want to somehow take your pain away"

2017-05-13 21:33:22 UTC  

You can't.

2017-05-13 21:33:29 UTC  

It's not possible. Pain is all there is.

2017-05-13 21:33:33 UTC  

Nothing works.

2017-05-13 21:33:34 UTC  

This bleeding heart may not be of a liberal, but it still feels deeply

2017-05-13 21:33:46 UTC  

Most racially aware people do.

2017-05-13 21:34:46 UTC  

You don't start becoming concerned about demographic replacement without going through a nadir because you understand that it will be your fate as well. "...for somewhere out there is a German soul in a worse state than I am, and it is my duty to lift him up as a fellow German."

2017-05-13 21:38:09 UTC