everything stops being shitty when you're getting a blowjob

gay is by definition is shit

when man's off to work they cook up tea

and raise children

i mean yeah that sounds chill not having to worry about your kids then she says that you dont take enough responsibity and files an divorce

sans a closet homosexual

thats why he doesnt want a gf

he wants a bf

dude ive had a gf

was it a girl(boy)

during summer camp i had her number never called her

chad

chod

chud

chode

@saN all my female friends also cant cooj

Cook

yeah

how the thought of blacks touching my food makes me feel
https://youtube.com/watch?v=wQE0blj5iyI

honestly if i get married im gonna be cooking

chud

if she makes shit food and doesnt let me cooki m hitting

I've been with my wife for 10 years now. We met in high school, and I got her pregnant.
She is and always has been a lazy person and a shit cook. I wouldn't even mind eating shit food if she at least made it on time. But she rarely did.

We'd get into screaming arguments constantly about how lazy and worthless she was. I felt like an asshole for it, but goddamn she was a real piece of work. The only reason I dealt with all this was for the kids, and also because the sex is great.

But one night, I got fed up. Not only did she get drunk, neglect the kids, and made me top Ramen for dinner, but she decided to give me attitude too. She was being real fucking bitchy. So I told my grandparents to keep an eye on the kids and told my wife we were going to go out and have dinner together. I drove maybe 3 blocks to a quiet area (we live in Oregon, it's not hard to find a quiet field) and I got out of the car, went around like I was going to open her door for her and let her out, and I just beat the shit out of her while she was still seatbelted. After a few punches, I asked her if she wanted to go back to her parents. She started screaming and yelling and said yes, so I beat the shit out of her again. Then I asked her what she wanted to do. She finally got smart and said she wanted to go home. So I took her home and dared her to start trouble. I even handed her my cellphone and dialed her mom's number on the drive home. I made her talk to her mom, while daring her to fucking say something.

Before that incident, I had never laid a hand on her. But I had always threatened it. I told her "one of these days, if you don't straighten up, I'm going to lay hands on you."

All my meals have been on time, and she just recently tried to make a meatloaf. It was mediocre, but I was just thrilled that she tried.

Who here can cook

me

anybody who isnt a retard can

and that is because my dad taught me

you'd be surprised

my dad can make some really fucking good food

It's a shame how many people can't balance macros

People who don't know what an APR is

people who don't know what a pilot hole is

I can make uh

fried rice

fried eggs

fried noodles

goat curyr

>i can make eggs

congratulations

where

the fuck is my food