Once when I was driving by the mall, I saw a group of millennials arguing among each other. I watched on in excitement as they were about to fight, but my smile quickly turned into a frown when I realized that instead of a real fight, they were having a dance battle. I stopped my car, got out and walked straight up to the one in the middle doing what appeared to be a fortnite dance, and i punched him square in the face. He fell straight down slamming his head to the ground, knocking him out. His friend nearby let out a blood-curdling scream. So i backhanded him which sent him flying backward. Then three millennial boys (i'm calling them boys, because they didn't act like men) approached me and tried to actually use physical force against me. Three millennials against one boomer? No problem. I decided that today will be the day i teach them what being a real man is like. After a few seconds of back and forth, I easily had all of them on the ground, moaning and wincing in pain. One girl nearby, watching the whole spectacle seemed to be in shock. I asked her if she was okay. She said that she never felt so attracted to someone when she saw me fight. She complained that she was tired of dating feminist libtards. I told her that if she wants to be in a relationship with a real man, then she should either stop dating millennials or move to another country. She agreed and left, as I sucker-punched another millennial who tried to attack me from behind.
I know some of you think i'm being too hard on them, but someone needs to teach these millennials. If we don't do it, who will? A few years after that incident, i received a letter in the mail from one of the boys i fought. He thanked me for giving him the ass-kicking he deserved. He said he stopped playing fortnite. He grew some facial hair and is not gay anymore. I feel like a proud father.
