fine I'll use normal lettering

The Earth is a cucumber and no one can change my mind

I

i'm open to discussion, gtg for now tho

The Earth is a cucumber. What we eat in our salads (called "cucumbers") are mini Earths made by the Earth itself for consumption.

The Earth is a living being, it is a cucumber. It creates these mini versions of itself as a way of expelling waste. Humans eat these cucumbers. When the human dies, they are buried into the Earth. The Earth then consumes them for its own food. It then converts its food into waste, the cucumbers, and the cycle starts all over again.

Yes

Any who cremates is depriving the Cucumber Earth of its well deserved food.

As for the other plants on Earth that are not cucumbers, those are to Earth what pimples are to humans. Humans don't need to eat them, but it has no adverse effects if they do.

The Cucumber Earth does not like burnt food

np

Or... it IS happening...

The Earth is a cucumber now, which means it will inevitably become a pickle

Yes

The Earth will not last forever

But it has a longer life-span than an ordinary cucumber because of its constant feeding on human corpses

Yes

When it rains, that's just the pickle juice flowing down from space. And space is just the jar in which the Cucumber Earth resides. Eventually, the pickle juice will encompass the entire Earth, turning it into a pickle.

Now you're getting it.

And those mouths belong to other humans, who have their own Cucumber Earth, which also has its own black holes, and it goes on forever.

No, I legitimately believe the Earth is a cucumber.

It's too much of a coincidence to ignore.