hmmm so

this is a very strict, specific definition on what it is to be a man. it seems inspired by jesse's definition of man, which is, as i can gather, the ideal human being; the perfect christian male, and no other type of male can be a man. do i have that right?

your input is appreciated here, csquare

yes a man is a man.

lol

Any you hot bois listen to Roy masters?

why aren't people allowed to be angry? even for a little while?

i'm sure we all get angry once in a while. what is it about anger that makes one seem weak? it can be totally justified.

i've heard jesse say anger comes from the devil, but i've also heard him say it has more to do with being a woman - i can't quote him on those because i can't remember, but those 2 had me a bit confused

wow...

I’ve never heard of Roy masters

And yes like csquare said. Boys are boys, men are men, girls are girls and women are women.

sometimes i wonder if jesse is being serious 70% of the time

haha, i do too, narratory. he's got a sense of humour for sure, and doesn't hide it! the only problem is, half the bloody time you can't tell if he's joking or not when he says some of the things he does

it's part of his appeal to me actually

No one is saying you aren’t allowed to be angry. Be angry if you want to be lol. I don’t see the point of anger or any benefit from being angry. I have lost the desire to be in that state.

well, not saying that we aren't -allowed- to be angry, but if we are, then we're either beta, a woman, or of the devil (hope you don't mind me bringing jesse's words into this and chucking them next to yours. if you do, just say)

again, this is about what's not being said. the subtle implications of this definition of man

Hehe

I say that men who have anger are beta because it’s the truth. It’s just a funny way to phrase it.

In reality anyone to carries or holds onto anger is living under that illusion. If they’re comfortable with that so be it, but it will erode and cause problems down the line. I know that from experience.

Anger has NEVER helped me in life.

no doubt anger can be destructive as all fuck. it's never helped me either - in fact it's taken me further away from who i need to be. the anger didn't make me feel beta though, or womanly, or of the devil. for example: i used to be really into debating when i was younger, and i was very naive, ill-informed and misled, in that i only wanted to win a debate, not learn from this person or journey with them to new insight. i used to say i got so fired up because i was passionate for the talk, but really, it's because i was stupid

i noticed that i could stay on track in a debate until i got angry, at which point i'd get dirty as hell with it

i worked on my anger. i'm pretty free of the bullshit it used to throw up in my brain

i just bring that up as an addition to what you said, ppf. now i think there wasn't much point, lol

i wanted to ask if it's possible for someone to feel angry in response to a given situation without necessarily "having anger," in the sense of carrying it around with them etc

Anomie I understand 200% , I also notice a moment right before I am about to blow tf up, where it if I just pay attention I don't act like an out of control woman

yeah csquare, i'm with you on that one. a distinction someone made for me which really helped was that between a reaction and a response, and how, in tense situations, you might need to take a few seconds before engaging something, so you formulate a proper response instead of just reacting

Whew this is hard to articulate but I will try

respect, ppf

I'm at home with my seeds, I'll look at yall later

Having anger and not having anger is black and white, no grey area; from my experience in the situation that requires a quick response and would “normally” provoke anger or rage it came down to discerning reality. It’s very complex to put into words but in the heat of the moment I stay calm and in control, i let emotions go through me without holding onto it, the devil (the deceiver, the negative energy/chi/darkness/the lie/ etc.) tries to fill me with doubt or persuade me to ignore reality and associate and link memories, feelings, pride, whatever to convince me that the lie is reality. If I buy into that lie I would garner anger and it will lead me to ruin. If I doubt the doubt I can see reality clearly, I can understand the situation and the pressure/need for anger disappears. Even in the event that I need to defend myself physically I can act without anger.

Anger comes from the devil

The devil used women to get to the man

Women aren’t inherently evil, but are used by evil to pull others away from good. Like men, most women are unaware of what they do.

Good women are influenced by good men and are able to function perfectly

Bad women are or were influenced by bad and weak men. Women hate and resent a weak man and that destroys a woman... And the poison spreads.

Later csquare ✌️

ah, ppf, ty for answering. i'm in a skype call. give me 5-10, then i'll read

It is possible to see the anger coming and cast it away. In time the initial feeling of anger won’t even exist. You will have peace

No problem man

You literally have to love the hell out of your wife

Literally love the hell OUT of your wife

Hah that's it

Not sure if I’m coming in this with the correct context but I’d like to join the discussion. I find that I rarely have anger, these days especially. What I do feel is nervous energy, trembling etc, when in certain situations that would usually have sparked anger in the past. I feel nervous because I want to respond appropriately, stand my ground if necessary, but also not respond the way the person or situation expects me to. I usually feel peace afterwards when I successfully skirt anger. But there is an energy there that is powerful in the moment for me. Speaking usually about debate or tough conversations.

Sounds like joy

Like conversations with black children of the lie especially. They have so much hate for me. I try to come from a place of love when I explain what’s wrong in black culture and society. I think maybe I’m nervous that I won’t succeed in defeating the hate they feel

Hate me*

If they do nothing of value will be lost

You know that

I dunno what typo I just corrected 😂

I do feel that changing minds is valuable. Maybe that’s where it comes from, I want to express myself clearly and nervous that maybe I will be misunderstood

Things like standing my ground are easy to do without getting angry because I know the difference between being assertive and being angry and being bullied as a kid taught me not to let people push me around. But a battle of the wits is sometimes tricky for me.

Lol

Maybe it’s the fear of being misunderstood and the other party spiraling into anger and attacking you? (Not just physical attacks)

Maybe it is fear

Fear is another form of anger. Essentially fear is born from resentment or anger from the past.

Ah I see

I fear being wrong too

thanks for answering man @PastPresentFuture

Fear is of the same nature of anger* the deceiver wants to put any emotion he can inside you to steer you into destruction

Cheers 😁 @Anomie

You can learn from being wrong

Very true

yeah, fear does operate a lot of the same ways as anger. for me, being strong isn't about never feeling fear. it's about what you do with it, or don't. same with anger, or situations that would provoke anger

jay, could you say your fear of being wrong is something to do with your self-image, either how you see yourself or want others to see you?

It has to do with credibility

Strength to me is conquering fear and overcoming anger. Being in control of yourself and knowing yourself

what happens when you're proven wrong?

Like especially in this day and age, you say one “wrong” thing and it can stick to you

I try to be impeccable with words

Ya I hear my Co workers go on prosocialism rants all day. .. I don't day nothing bc I'm paid to design not debate. That fear keeps me getting a check

it sticks to you unless you let it change you. if people see that happening, it's hard for them to stick it to you

Lol

I agree anomie

csquare, better keep certain conversations on your own terms. not where it can fuck with your livelihood

Let it roll off ya

Yes sir

Well I wouldn’t say that’s fear necessarily csquare

Knowing the time and place to act is important

Jesse says there’s a time for everything and he’s right

Agreed, I’m the same. Luckily I live in a red(ish) state, and most people here are conservative Christians with good morals. It’s hard to find liberals around here, even at work

Fear of not eating hah

Lol

You are right that you get paid to design not debate, and it’s the right thing to do so you can provide for you and the family

Well I live in Louisiana and I work at the one place that stores libs

Haha that’s unfortunate!

I live in Louisiana too lol

Graphic designers...

504

I’m a graphic designer too 😎

Hah I'm 318

318 is Lafayette huh?

Use to be 337

Shreveport area now

Use to be laf area

Ohhh Shreveport is closer to Texas I’m jelly

Baton for you?

No, New Orleans I think 225 is baton