If you've ever watched the Ralph Bakshi version

that sounds like a fanfic in the making

Jackson lifted a bunch of scenes directly from that version

Bashki got more of it.

Yeah

Frodo: "I /could/ give you some ring... what are you gonna do for me?"

engage midgetsex

Dude you know excaliburnwas going to be lot?

With the Beatles?

And then became lotr and then Excalibur?

And he was going to have like the nazgul ride a rotting horse with no skin

As fell beasts

And Galadriel try to fuck Frodo

Yeah I think I knew the beatles were going to be in it

For the ring.

Also Gandalf smokes hashish.

I think the movie's special effects where galadriel turns green are the worst part

of the movies

He is a degen

And super rash

also Eowyn saying "you have some skill with a blade"

That is the point

Eowyn hitting on aragorn was lame in the movies.

In the books she is way more subtle

And tries to just fuck him.

It's nothing as bad as idk

Lancelot knifjt of the cart

Medieval romance where lancelot has sex every 5 pages

I always thought lancelot was a dick for dicking guinevere

does arthur kill them in that version or does he just go away sad

Like he gets new armor as a knight whose house he is staying at's wife and teenage daughter both want to fuck him.

No

This is the one where he rescues and fucks Guinevere.

And is her puppy dog.

I'm gonna be the president bay bayyy

laughin at night cause I tweet all day

He's her doe eyed puppy lover who is also Superman

And super jacked

And gets out of jail by bending ironbars

who wrote that shit

Chretien de troys