*slowly crawls away to reevaluate his life*

*Coldplay's "Fix You" plays*

Mesothelioma?

I don't think my knees have anything to do with this buuuuuuut okay

ah

Yeah I'm about to take more of this prescribed cough syrup and go to sleep

I used to run cross country & track

put a smile on your face

at tacatacataco bell

Ah, same state as me

my dad said that the body aches could probably be attributed to me staying in bed often

Nearly all day.

They tell you to get plenty of rest, which is also what I'm doing

No, I'm not this inactive when I'm well

I'm in my last year of high school, which is every day from 8-3. Now I haven't missed many days because we had snow here last week, but sitting around here doing nothing sucks

I actually went on Monday because I thought I was getting better, but that's when the back aches started

https://twitter.com/OrwellNGoode/status/960244899680608256 me_irl 🏈

I bet it was before political correctness took over

lol yeah

The people who call others "Nazis" don't even think about what the term exactly means before using it

they just think that Trump's a racist because he pointed out some real facts about illegal immigrants

and he believes in extreme vetting

https://twitter.com/shibsu/status/958659826044882944

Ugh jeez

While watching the Super Bowl I was on a server with these two other people, one of whom I talk to quite often because he knows a lot about animation and music

But if I had a dollar for every time he forced his liberalism into the conversation

"Oh I love this T-Mobile ad, it has a positive message"

"Of course the coach had to thank God"

"I bet some alt-righties got triggered over that Ram trucks ad, biggest bunch of snowflakes ever"

"If only healthcare was easier to access in this country"

Like yeah I enjoy talking to him if you can get him to stay away from politics

oh and he also said "oh no not another pro-war movie" and "yeah fuck corporate bigwigs" in response to this Groupon ad

What I really don't get is that the server has this no politics rule

yet he breaks it all the time. And he's a mod. Each time I call attention to it, someone has a lame excuse for it

Like when Doug Jones won Alabama, they were celebrating and I said "what about the no politics rule" and they were like "but something good happened, we should celebrate"

No I enjoy being there and all, it's just when they break their own rules that really piss me off. Fortunately it's not all the time though.

Once I did have a civilized conversation about politics on that server once. I thought it was gonna be like Wrestlemania but no it was decent

yes but this place is different, it's a server for fans of a political commentator

The server in question has nothing to do with politics

Huh. Funny that you mention that, right after the game I changed channels to Paramount Network, the next time I'll be watching TV is Wednesday night for episode 3 of *Waco*

and they were showing Cops as always

anyhoo sorry for venting, I needed to do it and quick

Good thing they don't stretch it to 16:9

I enjoy watching it sometimes but I've always enjoyed World's Wildest Police Videos better. It was from the late 90s and used dashcam footage instead

along with a narrator who was over the top, overdramatic music and fake sound effects

What was not to love?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m5i3DCQUfJA when scamming goes too far...

Now, the crime in Peach Creek is perpetuated by the Ed boys and their drug empire, making millions and spending them on jawbreakers instead of mansions and sports cars

I started watching Ed Edd & Eddy a few weeks ago. Watched several episodes while I was out of school sick.

I never really watched CN as much as Nick when I was a kid but I loved that show

Hula Burger

Plot twist: the Cheddar Man was lactose intolerant.

BORK BORK MUTHERBORKERS!

rip

got a real problem with The Onion

Whenever there's a mass shooting they recycle that same stupid headline. It's a *satirical* newspaper, so when they report on a real life event, they do it with a bias and a smugness.

Plus I wanna know where their facts originate from. Ordinarily, I'd say "eh" but if they're reporting on a real life event, surely they'd have to come from some actual, credible source.

https://twitter.com/TheOnion/status/963923505174728704

Aaaaand the ensuing tweets (and their replies) are just as bad.

You know damn well they're pushing for an anti-gun agenda.

https://twitter.com/TheOnion/status/964267336130756609

Once they tweeted out this picture of the FOX & Friends crew and titled it "Trump Retweets a Video from an Anti-Muslim Hate Group"

you mentioned it once

So today I went to a Pizza Hut carryout store. I was gonna order a "create your own" pizza

So I was looking up the toppings on my phone because I didn't see them on the menu at the restaraunt. I click the first link and see "poutine pizza" on there. It was then I realized I was looking at the Canadian Pizza Hut website.

~~peoplekind~~

oh yes, where are my manners

you haven't seen the last of me Batperson

What do broke Canadians eat?

Rapeople noodles!

https://twitter.com/ehjovan/status/966337532756725760 Horseshit.

https://twitter.com/unknownkongyt/status/971459762595483648?s=21

So McDonald's changed their logo for IWD.

Am I the only one who thinks it resembles the Burger World logo from Beavis & Butthead, or just about every fast food restaraunt in anime?

They're in trouble

Wendy's keeps calling them out on using frozen beef, now they're running around like chickens with their heads cut off!

So now they flip the M upside down to either say "Hey! We're as good, if not better than Wendy's!" or to make fun of them

***but McDonald's doesn't have chili***

There exists scientific proof that George Washington invented rap music with his good friend James Woods, when Woods traveled back in time to find Henry Ford before he introduced the Ford Ka to the European market, but he had to get the time machine from Jerry Cantrell first...

...but Cantrell was busy hosting an IKEA furniture convention inside the Staples Center, so then he had to go to Sweden to tell IKEA "call off the furniture convention" but when he arrived in Stockholm via jetpack, he was attacked by some asshole migrants, but used his karate skills he learned from that one episode of Seinfeld to ward them off.

Finally, he did everything I just listed in reverse order, but when he got the keys to the DeLorean, it failed to start. At least he's got a little Napa Know How in him.

And that's how Washington invented rap music.

~~insert Coppercab joke~~

(does that belong in <#392484867188850691> ?)

of course they would claim they invented it, just like the hamburger in the year 2000

I heard that during WWI, the name was changed to "ground beef patty sandwiches"

in an attempt to erase all signs of Germany from American society

that car looks like it was made in Roblox

Yeah, that and schools stopped teaching German

"Hey buddy, it took us three days to make that potato salad! THREE DAYS!"

I think I first heard of that from the Shrek 2 video game

he says "I'll stuff ye like haggis!" when he hits someone

Oh, Wu-Tang's a rap group?

anyhoo this is what inspired me to do that George Washington bit earlier

Episode 181, "The Mad Libs" which was named that because Seinfeld and David literally wrote it like they were playing Mad Libs.

it never saw the light of day

some say it's buried under Rockefeller Center, others say it's in Larry David's underwear drawer

Potato Chipman indeed.

Weak.