Title: “baby carrot”

My dad is away on business and coming back home tomorrow so I drove to LA to leave him a surprise and clean his house.

https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLeVD3s4UI9bax_lAJXnRHkBz7iWw66v6J

Ready to gamble away all my Christmas money.

Happy New Years

Happy NYE friends!

New Year’s Eve?

I woke up with the worst sore throat. I must have been snorting coke in my sleep. Cuz geez.

Hi guys

Hi squeakie

||hiss hiss||

YOURE NOT A LIZARD YOU POSER

It’s like a skink or a newt right

Yeah. It’s like a salamander

They are cute little reindeer slimes

Can you pet him?

Oooo

I wanna pet him

What does he eat

Fruits?

Or fishies?

I wonder if they eat leaves or nuts

Iguanas like mangos

And chimken

And human flesh in Florida

THEY ARE MY FAVORITE SHUT YOUR DIRTY LITTLE MOUTH BEFORE I WASH IT OUT WITH SOAP

I also like Komodo dragons. I got to touch one once.

What’s a dolt

Oh

I’m not silly!

You’re silly

Gottem

I’m sick and sleepy.

Didn’t James just get recanceled

So dumb

Wasn’t cancel culture just started by a bunch of insecure SJW’s?

I don’t say the n word.

It makes me nervous

I saw the video tho and James didn’t even say it

Well yeah fuck James

But he didn’t say it so. I’m not gonna say he did

James is just a bad person in his own right

Jeffreestar is an ex punk singer turned make up guru

You’re canceled mommy.

Like that?

Ew

Who wears belts?

OW!

WHAT

kinky

And scary

Mother dearest up in here

Except it’s not wire hangers

Mother you frighten me

<a:animatedSwet:590680767726747678>

How much is a kilo in pounds

Like 3?

Oop speaking of onions

He just posted a new video

I don’t even watch them anymore

I just had notifications on for when he first started going down

Now hes milking is and it’s not worth saving them

Are they really that old?

I didn’t think the oldest was that old. That’s unfortunate

Ooooo I just made a Twitter

I don’t get it. But I have one now.

Mine too

||hiss hiss technically we are aliens||

I found a rock once

My boyfriends hoodie?

What’s a booter?

What’s that

My boyfriend gave it to me when I bought him a new one.

It’s real comfy.

I have his sweat pants too

It’s a wonderful set

I’m sorry your sweater got taken.

V comfy.

Except I buy all my sweaters too big and then he steals mine

He took one of mine on deployment with him. <:penguinstab:591141052535013376>

I buy all my sweaters xl or larger to wear them without pants

10/10 would recommend

I don’t wear pants ever

Well at work

But usually just a sweater

I live in California where hoes don’t get cold

Well not in California

Honestly wide neck man. Kinda hot

I like a thicc

Just a thicc

Is it thicc. I like it.

I just like bubble butts

Boys with baseball butts. 10/10

OH YEAH. LIKE FARMER MUSCLES

Men with power tools...