Message from @asparkofpyrokravte

Discord ID: 535692805352456213


2019-01-17 09:27:09 UTC  

I know for a fact that men have been arrested when they call the police regarding abuse

2019-01-17 09:32:46 UTC  

So it's not a pervasive myth, and I'd like to know what part of any reliable study indicates that

2019-01-17 09:47:33 UTC  

Want to jump in on the twitter battle?

2019-01-17 09:48:07 UTC  

She's literally just saying "this news thing is not a source."

2019-01-17 09:53:39 UTC  

I avoid most social media like the plague

2019-01-18 05:25:58 UTC  

Bwhahahaha

2019-01-18 05:26:00 UTC  

"Because of pervasive myths like (men being arrested on the spot because they are abused) women are now told not to mention dv in the family court because of this notion that women will lie about it to gain the court's favour when the truth is that dv lies are miniscule and men lie about it just as often as women do"

2019-01-18 05:26:02 UTC  

yeah right

2019-01-18 05:27:40 UTC  

No way are DV lies miniscule when 25% of all divorces include allegations.

2019-01-18 05:28:09 UTC  

And not when lawyers are being taught and telling women to claim DV as part of a divorce

2019-01-18 05:29:31 UTC  

Also the study you cite there is silly: "IPV, as defined as physical, emotional, and/or sexual violence by her husband during their relationship"

2019-01-18 05:29:47 UTC  

sorry, IPV defined as emotional violence?

2019-01-18 05:31:24 UTC  

And the entire study is a survey that got an insignificant number of wives who went through and or caused messy divorces to tell their story and reported it from their point of view?

2019-01-18 05:31:40 UTC  

n=19

2019-01-18 05:31:44 UTC  

not quantitative

2019-01-18 05:31:47 UTC  

..

2019-01-18 05:31:57 UTC  

"Mothers often turned to family court for assistance in setting boundaries to keep children safe, but found that family court did not respond in ways they believed protected their children. Conversely, when women turned to the justice system for restraining orders or called the police for help against IPV, they generally found the justice system responsive."

2019-01-18 05:32:28 UTC  

Yeah, how the DV trick works is that you deal with the criminal/civil system first, and then return to family court with the restraining order

2019-01-18 05:32:36 UTC  

no shit sherlock

2019-01-18 05:34:30 UTC  

"When women make allegations of IPV or express concerns that fathers will harm children, the court often views them as obstructing the court process and the father’s right to have a relationship with their children " -- because family court doesn't seem to really check facts unfortunately, and because that claim unfortunately often is simply precisely what the court believes it to be thanks to the lawyer's advice and the inability of the court to sanction liars

2019-01-18 05:36:06 UTC  

..

2019-01-18 05:36:56 UTC  

On the other hand "Furthermore, many courts use the “friendly parent” presumption, which recommends that primary physical custody be granted to the parent most likely to encourage frequent contact of the children with the non-custodial parent. This presumption disadvantages mothers who disclose fathers’ abuse because they are then perceived as unfriendly parents" -- this is a real issue, but perhaps not quite the way the study describes. It applies to both men and women who contest cases, especially without using the restraining order trick.

2019-01-18 05:38:51 UTC  

..

2019-01-18 05:39:00 UTC  

Oh goodness, the study gets worse though: under the heading "Mothers’ strategies to protect children"

Avoid family court (n=2)
Family court provides no support (n=5)
Family court provides support after extreme harm (n=2)
Family court is supportive (n=2)

2019-01-18 05:40:20 UTC  

The data doesn't back up the study's assertions even at the low n count of the study

2019-01-18 05:42:50 UTC  

So basically about half of the mothers who pursued DV claims in family court got support in this non-quantitative study. Yet apparently family court doesn't react to DV claims...

2019-01-18 05:54:01 UTC  

...

2019-01-18 05:55:55 UTC  

Therefore, if I were to respond, I would say something like "That 'study' is effectively a collection of anecdotes with little to no explanatory power. Moreover, contrary to the study's claims, the study itself shows that about half of those mothers who pursued DV claims in family court were supported by the court. That said, I would agree that family court is ill supported to deal with criminal abuse and often does not respond appropriately both to allegations and actual abuse. Please note that ~25% of all divorces include domestic violence claims, and that lawyers have been found to advise their clients to claim abuse for the purposes of achieving a desirable outcome."

2019-01-18 06:01:25 UTC  

But that is far larger than twitter would allow even with me trying to keep it short

2019-01-18 06:02:40 UTC  

Also, you might actually be able to find hard numbers on domestic violence claims deemed spurious in divorce. IIRC one of the questions that may be asked when domestic violence is claimed to police is whether there is a pending divorce, because of how common that bullshit is

2019-01-18 09:14:42 UTC  

Hey, just wanted to say, good article about the Gillette ad!

2019-01-18 16:04:17 UTC  

@Linguini Thanks a lot! :)

2019-01-22 01:56:48 UTC  

You should link the family violence stuff on r/MensRights. Also, just link any original material posted there, to attract new viewers.

2019-01-22 01:57:54 UTC  

Perhaps have a sentence or two beneath each article explaining what menarehuman.com is about, and advertising the Discord server.

2019-01-22 02:00:34 UTC  

Thinking of which, it's about time for a new short promotion for the site and the Discord.
Mentioning the Gillette response in that post would be good because many people liked it (including myself!).
Then I could make it a sticky for a few days.

2019-01-22 09:25:22 UTC  

Cool, I'm working now but I will do. @goodmod By the way, are you saying each menarehuman article should have that bit at the end?

2019-01-23 09:21:21 UTC  

@goodmod and <@&524226120661336076> I'm going to be updating articles with the following at the bottom of each. Please tell me if you spot any errors or have any feedback before I add this to too many of them.