I don't have pamphlets, but if you find a church, they might have some to give you

i was making a mormon joke

Also, no mormons, charismatics, 18th century founded denominations of any kind (7th day, JWs, etc)

Lol

Mormonism is basically white islam

Unless you're geographically able to join the snake handlers. That's too hilarious.

It really really is, Oliver.

The church we need. The reformation we need. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yRujuE-GIY4&ab_channel=mutant763

white sharia is the motto

i gave bambam the option to run off to utah and have many wives, but he said no

<:3RFlag:437034578964905985>

gave him a major out

^

come on take the booty are runnnn

yea yea

White sharia is bs. Women should be all about enticing a husband, and after marriage enticing their husband to impregnate them as much as possible. While using their sensuality to passivey promote their churches. "Men, come to this church. We got hot chicks salivating for a man to serve."

In order to attend church in the main room, women must have a thigh gap.

b cups or larger

and be able to pull off a bare midriff

though they don't have to if they don't want to.

true sex sells

There's a gym in the back where the fatties can lift and do cardio while the sermon is pumped in.

That is a cheapening of Christianity.

can i trade baked goods instead?

Also, 40+ women with 3+ kids are exempt of course.

ALLLLLAHHHHHH SNAKKKKKBARRRR

In a town I used to live in there is a church called "Lord's Gym" with a giant painting of a crucified Jesus doing pushups painted on the outside wall.

Lol

lol i when a catholic church most of my life

Christ would be outraged by such a disrespectful attitude towards his faith.

It used to be a pizza place with a pipe organ. I've never been inside it, but I am 100% certian they ripped the pipe organ out so they could have a modern praise band.

we had CHUCK NORRIS JESUS

^ this but in color no shit i kid you not

I think He's be more upset at His depiction of Him submerged in piss

i think Christ would be far more outraged at the tainting of his faith than the mocking of it...

The idea that women should use their sexuality to attract men to the church is disgusting.

idk i always find it light heart that every group makes jesus look like them

In case you thought I was kidding.