have kids

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OMG stop telling me to have kids, I'll have them when Brad and I are ready.

Have kids and u too can run into a trailer hitch at full speed

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carrot poasting

hey, lewd

@MsNatSocialist I'm just poasting carrots

>mfw my kids' first person they meet is yuge

Save them for the oven for Sunday roast.

Fact, @northern_confederate already has 3 kids. I met them

why would you oven his kids

wtf

wrong

I have to amputate

It's Swole AF

JFC

but me and [redacted] will have 5 kids

You're going to have to go by Arrrrrrrrrrrgardian now

you're going to have a pegleg

I had roast carrots for dinner last night

sounds delicious

i like parsnips too

@YUGE I got nothin...tht was good

Ask @Brad's mobile about my dinner

Bread for dinner

@Convo what can u do for me if I cut my leg off below the knee?

apparently you made him lamb pork, I didn't know such a beast existed

I cooked for 10 people, fairly sure I was gonna have a melt down in the end... My mother was going to drive me insane with trying to dictate how I run my own kitchen.

I cooked a roast pork

@Convo Arrrrrrrrrrrrgardian needs a bionic foot so he can be Asgardian again

@FylnnGardian wait what

@MsNatSocialist I'm teasing, he said "lamb, no wait, pork"

Lookin bad fam

what

I ran into a trailer hitch at full speed

@Convo he kicked a trailer hitch and his foot is falling off