Message from @thedarkness05

Discord ID: 619074389618720779


2019-09-05 05:58:23 UTC  

I use damn near sandpaper daily.

2019-09-05 05:58:38 UTC  

Honestly i think my issue is i buy the cheapest ass toilet paper lmao

2019-09-05 05:58:39 UTC  

Pizza hut broke af

2019-09-05 05:59:02 UTC  

Gotta go luxurious with the poo paper.

2019-09-05 05:59:13 UTC  

Charmin or gtfo

2019-09-05 05:59:36 UTC  

Peasants. I use those baby wipes. Simply divine

2019-09-05 06:00:21 UTC  

Holy shit

2019-09-05 06:00:34 UTC  

You're on a whole other level

2019-09-05 06:00:54 UTC  

But in all seriousness a happy ass and feet are key to lomg term morale maintainence

2019-09-05 06:01:47 UTC  

You pretty well covered it

2019-09-05 06:02:04 UTC  

Thanks for coming to my BOOG talk

2019-09-05 06:02:42 UTC  

Beautiful

2019-09-05 06:40:02 UTC  

I kinda wanna try a bidet

2019-09-05 06:40:05 UTC  

I know its gay but

2019-09-05 06:40:19 UTC  

It makes me envision a world with no toilet paper

2019-09-05 06:40:21 UTC  

Very naisu

2019-09-05 06:41:52 UTC  

I gotta do it once

2019-09-05 06:42:10 UTC  

Haven't tried it so I can't weigh in on it. All I can say is that europe uses them a lot, take it as you will

2019-09-05 06:43:42 UTC  

Nvm. Ive been convinced

2019-09-05 07:38:45 UTC  

Who wants to hear really bad IT joke?

2019-09-05 07:40:36 UTC  

go for it

2019-09-05 07:41:19 UTC  

What PCP and PHP have in common?

2019-09-05 07:41:28 UTC  

idk

2019-09-05 07:42:03 UTC  

Both lead users to suicide

2019-09-05 07:42:45 UTC  

lel

2019-09-05 07:47:39 UTC  

Ok so I work for a School District, and while I'm walking the halls of an Elementary school I listen in to a first grade grammar lesson. The teacher asks the class "what comes at the end of a Sentence?" A young black kid shoots his hand up and loudly exclaims "An Appeal"

2019-09-05 07:48:30 UTC  

Fucking hell

2019-09-05 07:48:48 UTC  

That fucking killed me

2019-09-05 07:53:57 UTC  

I told that to the COs overseeing my internship. They loved it, but told me I probably shouldn't repeat it to the Sheriff

2019-09-05 07:54:59 UTC  

A zebra goes to heaven. He meets the angel at the gate and asks him if hes black with white stripes or white with black stripes. The angel tells him that that's a question for god and to ask him. After wishing him luck, the zebra is let through the gate. He finally meets god and asks him. God replies with you are what you are. The zebra is left unsure, but says nothing because its Fucking God and leaves. The zebra finds another angel in hopes of clarification.
"I asked God if i was black with white stripes or white with black stripes and he said 'you are what you are.' what do you think that means?"
"thats easy, you're white with black stripes."
"how do you know?"
"if you were black with white stripes, he would've said you is what you is"

2019-09-05 07:59:44 UTC  

Alright so this Soviet factory worker shows up late for his shift, he's warned by the foreman that another time infraction will not be tolerated. The next day the worker is on time, but he is executed for buying a foreign made watch

2019-09-05 08:01:55 UTC  

That made my day

2019-09-05 08:02:52 UTC  

Thank you, I'll be your resident /k/omedian

2019-09-05 08:03:12 UTC  

Im totally fine with this

2019-09-05 08:26:39 UTC  

My uncle used to be a VP for Rubbermaid, and lived in Hong Kong for work (About 8 or so years ago before the little luau goin on now). He said everything was fantastic, except for the phone system. Everything was so crowded and messy that he was almost never able to call his local clients, every time he would Wing he would get the Wong number

2019-09-05 08:34:02 UTC  

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/554191468747816962/619087835223425037/IMG_20190905_153257_756.jpg

2019-09-05 08:34:02 UTC  

Aye y'all drew this at work today

2019-09-05 08:35:39 UTC  

Thats beautiful

2019-09-05 08:35:43 UTC  

What did you use

2019-09-05 08:38:19 UTC  

Nice

2019-09-05 09:10:18 UTC  

@VI/K/INGinnaTRENCH/K/OAT pens and highlighters lol