Message from @John O -

Discord ID: 436689936951803904


2018-04-20 00:40:51 UTC  

Huh?

2018-04-20 00:42:58 UTC  

Weddings don't have to be expensive. Lots of fantastic ways to save.

2018-04-20 00:43:19 UTC  

At least where I live if you want a good wedding its probably at least 15k, then if you want a house in a good town/neighborhood its at least 300k

2018-04-20 00:43:27 UTC  

My parents got married in a park for next to nothing

2018-04-20 00:43:41 UTC  

yeah how do we avoid the wedding ((()))

2018-04-20 00:44:05 UTC  

Everyone has their own preference, but I would like my friends and family to be there.

2018-04-20 00:45:01 UTC  

@SamanthaM again, I just want to stress that you are correct, cohabitating is immoral, I just don't see a way around it

2018-04-20 00:45:18 UTC  

Major cost is the reception. Holding it at someone's home is a great way to save on that expense.

2018-04-20 00:45:23 UTC  

Pretty sure the wedding is expensive as *you* make it

2018-04-20 00:46:06 UTC  

unless you need a church or what not for religious stuffs

2018-04-20 00:46:34 UTC  

@John O - It's tough. Sin in the modern world is almost unavoidable.

2018-04-20 00:46:41 UTC  

Im glad ive found people who agree that living together isnt wholesome

2018-04-20 00:46:54 UTC  

redpill me on how it's a sin

2018-04-20 00:46:58 UTC  

I need to start going to Church again

2018-04-20 00:47:36 UTC  

@Deleted User because it leads to premarital sex

2018-04-20 00:47:58 UTC  

Some couples who live together are basically married but without the formality

2018-04-20 00:48:09 UTC  

*most

2018-04-20 00:48:13 UTC  

eh, I guess I can see that

2018-04-20 00:48:39 UTC  

Putting yourself in situations where someone you love is sleeping right next to you = premarital sex

2018-04-20 00:48:53 UTC  

Which is avoidable

2018-04-20 00:49:54 UTC  

I don't know, man, if I'm living with a girl, I'm not going to pull the fifties married couple different bed shit

2018-04-20 00:50:30 UTC  

that was only in movies

2018-04-20 00:50:41 UTC  

if youre married, I think youre allowed to

2018-04-20 00:51:05 UTC  

I know. I was just pointing out an example

2018-04-20 00:55:41 UTC  

Ignoring the religious aspect, this article points out some detrimental statistics concerning cohabitation. https://www.google.com/amp/s/mylordandmyblog.wordpress.com/2009/02/24/seven-reasons-why-living-together-before-marriage-is-not-a-good-idea/amp/

2018-04-20 00:58:50 UTC  

ok thanks

2018-04-20 01:04:22 UTC  

@SamanthaM All of the things he mentions are correlations but I see no proof that living together causes those problems. People who live together do so for many reasons. Some have a more liberal attitude regarding relationships and are therefore more likely to divorce. But that doesn't mean living together causes divorce. Or any of the other problems like violence or alcohol problems.

2018-04-20 01:11:39 UTC  

It's not necessarily *living together.* It's *living together before marriage.* Marriage is a a responsibility, like anything else. What the results are pointing to is that people who do not take this responsibility seriously are more likely to be irresponsible in other matters.

2018-04-20 01:15:45 UTC  

I was also thinking that people on the lower rungs of society are more likely to cohabitate for economic reasons

2018-04-20 01:16:24 UTC  

so just by shear numbers of the type of people who cohabitate first can add to those numbers

2018-04-20 01:16:29 UTC  

if that made sense

2018-04-20 01:18:47 UTC  

I agree with the general perception that, if a woman lives together with a man, doesn't marry him and then tries to continue dating she is seen as sullied, in the trad worldview at least.

2018-04-20 01:21:30 UTC  

@SamanthaM Exactly. That's correlation, not causality. If a responsible couple decides to live together without being married for whatever reason, they won't become more likely to have negative consequences just for that reason. The same as just because irresponsible couple gets married, doesn't mean they will stop drinking or being irresponsible.

2018-04-20 01:35:45 UTC  

One piece of advice gentlemen. If you break up with a girl, make her a complete stranger. No contact. Delete on line photos immediately. Delete her contact information and look forward completely. In addition once you get serious with a woman, drop all female friends. Don’t ever allow yourself to be in a room alone with another woman, even at work if you can.

2018-04-20 01:36:05 UTC  

^^^^

2018-04-20 01:46:34 UTC  

What would have happened to the couples who struggled with such problems that the article mentions if they got married and then lived together?

2018-04-20 03:03:20 UTC  

you have to work them out because you have a preexisting bilateral commitment to do so

2018-04-20 03:17:48 UTC  

I wonder why the mod had to issue that announcement. Was there a problem in the chat?

2018-04-20 03:19:47 UTC  

@Deleted User I learned that lesson the hard way.

2018-04-20 03:42:35 UTC  

@Rick there was an article about "female hypergamy" posted that I removed. I made the announcement to make sure everyone is on the same page that we are here to help IE members and not to lament the status (accurately or not) of dating today.

2018-04-20 03:49:45 UTC  

@ThisIsChris ha. ok. I thought it be something like that.