Message from @Pat-MA

Discord ID: 440309856864305152


2018-04-30 00:24:29 UTC  

I mean I guess everyone is different

2018-04-30 00:24:44 UTC  

Did you grow up in a stable household

2018-04-30 00:24:49 UTC  

You need to get her to grow up lol

2018-04-30 00:25:00 UTC  

Me? Ehhh kinda but not really

2018-04-30 00:25:09 UTC  

I wasn’t instilled with these ideals

2018-04-30 00:25:48 UTC  

Her mom kicked her out of the house when she was 16 so that doesnt help

2018-04-30 00:25:56 UTC  

Had to go live w her dad

2018-04-30 00:26:22 UTC  

That’s rough but hopefully those situations make you stronger and make you want to be better for your future family

2018-04-30 00:26:31 UTC  

that’s my opinion tho

2018-04-30 00:26:37 UTC  

Agreed ^

2018-04-30 00:26:43 UTC  

I’m tryna have 15 kids by 26

2018-04-30 00:27:10 UTC  

Nice

2018-04-30 00:27:15 UTC  

If you show yourself as a strong enough role model with your clean living then she will see how dumb she is being by contrast.

2018-04-30 00:27:23 UTC  

Hopefully

2018-04-30 00:27:29 UTC  

Thats what I’m trying

2018-04-30 00:28:01 UTC  

Lots of people do not grow up in this world we live in. I see it in a lot of my friends too. Im 27

2018-04-30 00:28:38 UTC  

Like all druggies fundamentally are trying to cope with something. If you can show her that she doesn't have to cope with the situation she used to be in then she doesn't have to smoke anymore.

2018-04-30 00:30:21 UTC  

Yeah Ive known that

2018-04-30 00:33:36 UTC  

do you really love her?

2018-04-30 00:33:47 UTC  

or are you just with her because you’ve been with her for so long?

2018-04-30 00:34:10 UTC  

I do love her

2018-04-30 00:34:46 UTC  

okay then you gotta put your foot down and let her know your standards and expectations for her behavior

2018-04-30 00:34:53 UTC  

and make it known you want a future with her

2018-04-30 00:35:12 UTC  

Sounds good

2018-04-30 01:30:25 UTC  

@Pat-MA how long have you two been together?

2018-04-30 01:38:16 UTC  

@Pat-MA Is she redpilled on race, the jq, etc? Is she on board with IE?

2018-04-30 20:40:12 UTC  

@ThisIsChris 3 years and change. @Rick she knows my views and is cool with it but doesnt get into that stuff. But she did make fun of all the Trump protestors after the election calling them babies, hahah

2018-04-30 21:38:47 UTC  

@Pat-MA I see. Pretend you have never dated her and she was being described to you by a friend with the details you are sharing, would you be interested in her?

2018-04-30 21:39:18 UTC  

No, but I am not mentioning all the good things.

2018-04-30 21:40:49 UTC  

And I also do not believe that there is a such thing as a perfect person for anyone. There will be challenges and things to overcome no matter who you are

2018-04-30 22:46:18 UTC  

^this tbh

2018-04-30 23:12:46 UTC  

@Pat-MA I agree. I think "staying together" vs "not staying together" is not really the question now. I'm going to go with the assumption you will stay together and then I would advise that you work with that. The reason her smoking pot bothers you is because you care about her well-being. People usually do that to help deal with their emotions. I suggest looking into mindfulness. There's a great app called Headspace I recommend as an introduction. Maybe you two could do it together. It's very powerful to get control of your mind.

2018-05-01 01:02:01 UTC  

@Anthony Sealy - MO
> When you meet the one that truly makes you want to be a better man, don't let her go. You'll feel it. It won't feel like she's out of your league. You'll just want to be the best you can be for her because she deserves it. That's the one.

I'll forever remember this quote.

I know you said you'll likely not provide other advice, but I like this one so much, I encourage you to share more.

2018-05-01 01:09:29 UTC  

I'm not sure if this is a thing or not but I noticed growing up boys were not really encouraged to trust their gut or intuition the same way girls were. I never really started using intuition until after college but once i did i started making better decisions. moral of the story is trust your gut and you will find the answer

2018-05-01 02:13:06 UTC  

Cool stuff, @ThisIsChris , that is something new

2018-05-01 02:16:42 UTC  

@Pat-MA it's really life changing for someone who struggles to get along in life

2018-05-02 11:35:30 UTC  

Ok gonna finally chime in here. Stick with the mindfulness that is good,also trust your gut intuition, it doesn't lie to you,its there for a reason.

2018-05-02 11:38:39 UTC  

As for the smoking pot,i think for most like myself,its something you hopefully grow out of as i did the older i got saw the people i was around and how they were going nowhere,also didn't want chances of getting caught by cops,i did this in teens,by late 19 I was cleaning out of system & dropped and dropped it all,cleaned self up,didn't want to associate with that crowd.

2018-05-02 11:39:37 UTC  

As to the mindfulness, you have to get it in the right strong frame of mind to do so & make that move to quit for good.

2018-05-02 11:41:25 UTC  

As to the living with someone before marriage, i think that's most realistic, what we did & also what our kids have done to make sure that person is right to live with,to see habits, see if you can handle,etc.

2018-05-02 11:41:45 UTC  

Now i say this as to my life experiences..