All I need is 2mL of spit and I can tell you anything you'd like to know about your past future and present.

*Sorcery*

Just need to find mah crystal ball first

Psh I can do the same thing with a deck of cards

Tarot cards are for the ladies

All this Gattaca talk...

Jk that's not actually what tarot is for

Bunch of deGENErates at this hour amirite? @Phillip Wiglesworth - FL

lol

Still waiting for this genetically superior baby to decide he's ready to begin life on the outside

He needs to be taught a stern lesson about the importance of punctuality.

Due dates are a scam

All hype

Set you up for a letdown

I've turned to *ancient Chinese secret* to try to coax him out

Oh boy here we go. Don't ingest any more jade please

Acupuncture two days in a row

They say it helps get things moving

Did you go to an actual chinaman? I know a guy locally that is very good, Wei Wang is his name

Chinese sorcery @missliterallywho , but whatever helps.

Three sessions total, two with white guys and one with an Asian woman today. Don't know if she's Chinese but she is also a doula.

One of the white guys had the same name as the baby

Yet he still was unable to induce

Bummer

I did have 3 hrs of contractions after but they did not produce the baby

Baby yields must be maximized for our people to survive

I hope to report back tomorrow with better news

Have you asked him why he hasn't exited? Maybe he is a little too comfy, scared or anxious to leave

Given the society in which we live

Lol he does seem quite comfy

this is a funny conversation hah

There’s definitely a cat joke in here somewhere

I would tell him that every day that he stays prolongs the arrival of his next sibling.... Wait that would probably make him stay in longer

Uh oh, time to assume my final form as last boss of the internet.

We cant disparage each other like this since many do not enjoy being disrespected

I'm Scottish and Norwegian...bring your best insults. I look forward to the banter. 😃

I know but you gotta consider the feelings of others

Bagpipes are pretty chad

Never go full autist

OOF

Rule fourteen will be “Don’t type words in the server.”